I am sure we all grieve deeply and pray earnestly with Rick and Kay Warren, as they mourn the shocking loss by suicide of their dear son, Matthew, after many years of struggle with mental illness. Perhaps pray especially for Kay as she has had her own battles with depression.

From all that I can gather of the circumstances surrounding this tragic situation, I believe that Rick, Kay, the church, and the caring professions did all that they could to prevent this happening, and should not blame themselves. As many of us have also experienced, when someone’s mind has gone so far and their emotions have sunk so deep, and they are determined to end their life, it’s virtually impossible to stop.

As well-publicized suicides tend to increase the suicide rate quite dramatically, I thought it would be good to address seven of the questions that arise in our minds at times like this.

How common is suicide?

  • It is estimated more than one million people die by suicide each year in the world, or more than 2,700 people per day
  • There has been a 31% increase in the number of suicides in the U.S., from an estimated 80 a day in 1999 to 105 a day in 2010.
  • Nearly 20,000 of the 30,000 deaths from guns in the United States in 2010 were suicides, according to the most recent figures from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
  • Suicidal acts with guns are fatal in 85 percent of cases, while those with pills are fatal in just 2 percent of cases, according to the Harvard Injury Control Research Center.
  • 465,000 people a year are seen in ER for self-injury.
  • Suicide is the third-leading cause of death for teenagers.
  • 7% of 18-39 year olds said that they had seriously considered suicide in the last year.
  • In 2010, the last year for which figures are available, 22 veterans took their own lives every day, with the largest number occurring among men between 50 and 59.
  • Depression is the key indicator in two thirds (@20,000) of all suicides
  • Other key indicators are childhood abuse and confusion over sexuality.

How do I know if someone is thinking about suicide?

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline says three major signs of immediate suicide risk are:

  1. Talking about wanting to die or to kill oneself
  2. Looking for a way to kill oneself, such as searching online or obtaining a gun
  3. Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live

Other behaviors may also indicate a serious risk, especially if the behavior is new; has increased; and/or seems related to a painful event, loss, or change.

What should I do if I’m worried someone I know is going to commit suicide?

Although it’s counter-intuitive, the most important thing to do is to ask the person if they are thinking about taking their life. Do so in a non-threatening, non-confrontational way, to make it as easy as possible to speak openly about their thoughts and feelings. “I see you’re hurting very deeply. I’m so sorry and really want to help. Is it bad enough, that you’ve been thinking about taking your own life?” Rather than plant suicidal thoughts in their minds, this may allow the suicidal person to admit it and to seek professional help. This is vital and urgent if they tell you that they have got to the stage of making a plan. One of the best short pieces I’ve read on this is 8 Things you need to know about suicide prevention.

Do Christians who commit suicide go to hell?

The short answer is “No!” and this is explained further in two great articles: Suicide, Salvation, and Eternal Security by Bob Kellemen and Do people who commit suicide automatically go to hell? by  Michael Patton. Every Christian dies with unconfessed sin and suicide is not the unpardonable sin.

Who is to blame?

The best answer I’ve come across is In the wake of suicides, why blame is never the answer. There Jen Pollock Michel says:

Trying to locate blame is not usually helpful when seeking to understand why a person has chosen to take his life, especially when that locus of blame is sought by outside observers. The reasons are never immediately obvious, even to those within the closest circles of family and friends. Moreover, the problems are never one-dimensional or easily fixed. I believe firmly that survivors of suicide heal in part as we learn to refuse the responsibility for the choice our loved ones have made.

What if I’m thinking of suicide myself?

Ask God to deliver you from temptation and talk to your loved ones, or your pastor, or your doctor. Or phone National Suicide Prevention Hotline  at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

In Broken MindsPastor Steve Bloem gives a number of reasons he has, at times, used to convince himself not to commit suicide:

  • It is a sin and would bring shame to Christ and His church.
  • It would please the devil and would weaken greatly those who are trying to fight him.
  • It would devastate family members and friends, and you may be responsible for them following your example if they come up against intense suffering.
  • It may not work and you could end up severely disabled but still trying to fight depression.
  • It is true – our God is a refuge (Ps. 9:10)
  • Help is available. If you push hard enough, someone can assist you to find the help you need.
  • If you are unsaved, you will go to hell. This is not because of the acts of suicide but because all who die apart from knowing Christ personally will face an eternity in a far worse situation than depression.
  • If you are a Christian, then Jesus Christ is interceding for you, that your faith will not fail.
  • God will keep you until you reach a day when your pain will truly be over (59-60).

 What can the church do to prevent suicide?

The single biggest thing the church can do to reduce the suicide rate is to admit there is such a thing as mental illness. The second biggest thing we could do is for pastors to admit they need professional help from other disciplines and caring professions to minister to all the complex needs of those suffering such indescribable agonies. As Adrian Warnock, a psychiatrist by training wrote:

Please, if someone you know and love is suffering in a similar way, don’t let anyone persuade you not to reach out for everything medical science can offer. In many cases it can be literally life saving. Too many of us don’t understand just how serious these illnesses are. I pray that this shocking news may help thousands realize that although faith may be protective in such situations, medicine is often also needed to help.

Judgment Day alone will declare how many people took their lives because they were too frightened of the condemnation that would be heaped upon them in the church if they admitted to struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts. If there’s one thing that infuriates me (usually holy anger, sometimes not so holy) it’s the ridiculously ignorant and horrifically insensitive statements that some pastors and Christians make about depression and mental illness.

The church would do well to recapture the Puritan’s motto in all their counseling: “A bruised reed He will not break, and smoking flax He will not quench” (Matthew 12:20). Sometimes, however, as Matthew Warren experienced, even the most tender and loving of human care is not enough to keep us in life. But nothing shall pluck us out of our Savior’s hand (John 10:28).

UPDATE: Here are some of the best articles I’ve read on this subject in the last 24 hours.

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  • Adam Thompson

    Thanks for this article, David. We’re currently in Japan, where suicide is the #1 cause of death for men ages 20-44.

    Such a wonderful note to end your article with: “nothing shall pluck us out of our Savior’s hand (John 10:28).”

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Thanks Adam. What a comfort that quote is.

  • Reg Schofield

    A good friend of mine and I were just talking a couple weeks ago about how many Churches have little space for the hurting or down cast soul. The broken reed has no place it seems in modern evangelical world. Our songs are happy , clappy and we must be on the road of constant victory . Excellent thoughts and having known people who have committed suicide or tried as well , my prayers are with the Warren’s at this dark time .

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Good point, Reg. You’re right, there is a wider context here to consider.

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  • Alastair Manderson

    The great evangelist Willie Mullan took his own life. It was said at his funeral
    “Don’t you dare to think…that a few pellets from a shotgun can extinguish eternal life in a man’s soul. The day that Willie Mullan was saved…he became a member of Christ. Who shall seperate us from the love of God? NOTHING”

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Let’s keep hold of that NOTHING!

  • Flora Compton

    Excellent article but I think that there is another dimension that we are sometimes afraid to tackle. There is little ‘fear’ of God now and for many suicide is seen as a way out of the problems they are having. A young man in our town took his own life last week because he had financial difficulties. He first ‘trashed’ the building he was supposed to be renovating. There is very little warning in any preaching these days of the awfulness of an eternity separate from God and all that is good. The comments are usually ‘He is at peace now’, or “he has gone to a better place” but should we not shudder to think that some have indeed gone to a much worse place where they will never experience peace again and plead with the Lord to raise up faithful men who will preach the ” Whole counsel of God”.

    • Lydia

      While I agree that the ‘fear of God’ should be preached, I don’t think it is right to attempt to scare people out of suicide. To treat suicide as ‘for many a way out of the problems they are having’ I think is possibly a little naive. I don’t know how well you know this person who took his life, but in my experience, I don;t know of anyone who undertook it lightly and all we in some sense mentally unstable. By this I mean that their actions were not warranted by their situation. To someone that is depressed, stepping in dog poo can push them over the edge from ok to suicidal. I’ve never seen a case where depression is not a main cause, usually with a triggering event. I think the church needs to accept that mental health exists and simply preaching at them what they most likely already know will not help. These people like those right at the beginning of Job, who sat and mourned with him, not those at the end who tell him he is doing it wrong. A normal person who encounters great difficulties does not consider suicide as a logical option. Entertaining the notion and carrying through are two entirely different scenarios. These Christians need to be reminded of the real, suffering God who is with them in the sorrows and pain. I think there is of course a place for the teaching of the fear of God and I agree that we do not focus on it enough, but as someone who has been to the brink and back, I certainly would not have been helped by an attempt to scare me out of it with the prospect of hell. I was as much a Christian then as I am now but the immense pain I felt and my inability to cope with what most others would do brush off in a day meant that death seemed like the most beautiful relief, come heaven or hell.

      • John

        Don’t think Flora was talking about “scaring people out of suicide”. Nobody should take mental illness lightly. Nobody is in a place evaluate the ultimate destiny of a professed Christian who commits suicide. I do not believe she was referring to the invocation of fear as an applied remedy, but to the proper preaching of the fear of the Lord as a general preventative. And she is right in her observation that this this is an element that is largely absent from modern Western preaching.

        Compassion, not judgment, should be foremost here. But make no mistake, suicide is a sin. It is an act of rebellion against God. It is not the unforgivable sin, but for some, it is the last act of rebellion. To whatever degree it is driven or aggravated by mental illness, it is still, in most cases, a self-centered act that punishes and torments loved ones in a profound way.

        It is just as groundless to automatically assume the salvation of a suicide victim/perpetrator, as it is to assume their condemnation.

      • Gary

        Lydia. As another who has been there, I say, “Amen”.

      • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

        I agree, Lydia. Logic is usually in short supply when people are in these painful situations. We need to be very, very careful about what we say. So thankful the Lord brought you back from the brink.

      • Rick Crompton

        I would disagree with your comment that it is not right to scare people out of suicide. The problem with too many preachers today is their unwillingness to convey the reality of God as both the dispenser of grace and of wrath.
        Just before the final benediction in Jude, we read, “…of some have compassion, making a difference; others save with fear hating even the garment spotted by the flesh…” This implies that some people will respond to the counsel of kindness but some others to the counsel of pending judgment that elicits fear pointing to repentance. We need to have discernment concerning which approach to apply when dealing with people contemplating wilfull sin — and suicide is a willful choice to disobey God. In some circumstances one approach will work more effectively than the other — or perhaps a combination of the two is required — but we should remember that instilling fear is a biblically-endorsed approach that should never be discounted.

      • JRoberts

        While I have read much on this subject and have even experienced the feeling of hopelessness to the point that I understood why people take their own life, it is not for us to know a man’s true heart.
        In the midst of my depression, I cried out to the Lord and He heard my plea and gave me a new hope!
        As far as excusing or judging whether a person who commits suicide is in heaven or hell is NOT for any one of us to decide. Whether we like it or not God is the ONE and the only ONE who will determine that.
        By saying they will still go to heaven emphatically may only help someone to take that action to end their misery; or by saying they will spend eternity in hell, only adds sorrow and pain to those loved ones left behind.
        We humans with our finite understanding are taking it up on ourselves to determine who is “normal” or apparently “abnormal”.
        The truth of it all is God is the JUDGE and if we have that personal relationship with Him we will trust that He will either make a way out or receive us when we die or reject us but no matter how much we say someone goes into heaven, WE DON’T KNOW!
        I am a minister and I have compassion on those experiencing depression, but recognizing that mental illness exists will NOT end suicide.

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Flora, you make a good point about hell not being preached enough. I don’t think this is scaring people out of suicide. It’s giving people information they need to have and often don’t.

    • Kathleen

      no where in the Bible does it say that if we take our own lives will we suffer in hell.

    • HP

      The statement about people not fearing God as much, while true in cases, is a very general statement and not wholely true. A person may feel fear of God, but also extreme hopelessness as they continue to cry out day and night to The Father , only for the circumstances (i.e. troubles) to remain or get worse. Had you thought of that scenario? No one knows but God. Folks don’t walk in others shoes, but are quickly opinionated or judgmental about THAT person’s situation.

  • Michael

    Thanks for the summary Dr. Murray. But why is it everyone asks the question, “Do Christians who commit suicide go to hell?” From a Reformed perspective, we both know that is the wrong question to ask. The right question that every pastor must ask himself is, “Given that the taking of a human life is this person’s last act, do I feel confident he/she was a Christian in the first place and what do I base that confidence on?”

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  • Matt

    I’m all for extending compassion – loads of it – to Rick Warren and his family at this time. I can’t imagine losing any of my children this way.

    Still, most of the responses I’ve seen seem to do a couple of things that don’t jive with me. First, “depression” is treated monolithically – especially in attempting to ascertain WHY someone is depressed/suicidal. As if every depressed person is the same.

    Second, is there something going on on a broader scale to explain the increase in depression? Take one commenter’s example of Japan. Why is the rate higher there than, say, in Denmark. Or Italy. Or the US.

    Again, does the church think as wisely about prevention, or are we somewhat deterministic about the possibility of change/growth (e.g. “I’ve always struggled with depression”)?

    Just wondering if we’ve been as thorough as Christians as we should be.

    • Nathan

      Matt, as someone who grew up in Japan, I can tell you that the reason suicide is so high in Japan is almost exclusively cultural pressure. While westerners run straight to “mental illness”, the designation is unhelpful in the context of Japanese suicides. To keep this short, common reasons for committing suicide are: brought shame upon the family, failed a test, video game character died (true story), bullied at school, did something at work that will prevent all future promotions.

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Great questions, Matt. I hope and pray that as people process these events, such questions will be seriously considered and answered.

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  • http://reformedreactions.blogspot.com Jim Pemberton

    Great material packed in here. These are things every Christian should become acquainted with. “Be ready to share the hope you have within you” surely includes this kind of ministry. Wise counsel is a form of apologetics.

    • Tom

      Very well done, Dr. Murray. This issue is heartbreaking. Thanks.

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Jim, you’re so right. Ignorance reigns – but it doesn’t stop people thinking they are experts.

  • kathy

    In the USA the highest risk group for committing suicide is white males 85 years old and over.

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  • Johnson Varghese

    Hello, I was shocked to see the statistics of people taking their life when God was asking Cain, “Where is your brother?” We all share the responsibility and accountability of the events happening under our nose. The Bible not only has the word for encouragement and love, but it has words of warning and correction. (2 Timothy 3:16) And (Hebrews 3:12) It’s warning that we should not have an evil heart of unbelief. (1 Cornithians 3:16-17) And (1 Corinthians 6: 19-20) Shows that our body belongs to the Lord. He purchased us by His blood. Our Lord Jesus said that in Matthew 7:21 and Luke 6:46 that “why do you call me Lord when you don’t do the things which I say?” We need to teach and preach in our churches about repentance and salvation. And also, not only Jesus as our Savior alone but also He is Lord of our lives. I encourage all Christians around the world to watch and pray for our fellow brothers in Christ more serously as we are responsible for watching their lives.

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      The stats are shocking aren’t they. Yes, we do have a shared responsibility.

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  • kt

    While we are all obviously saddened over the Waren’s loss(anyone with children can immediately put himself in their place and think of how devastating the loss of a child would be,)I am concerned about the use of this one incident to paint the church with very broad brushes.
    In this article many questions go unanswered, such as:
    How many suicides happen by those within the church?
    Of those, how many were not receiving help?
    How do we explain the rise in suicides while there has also been a rise in the number of professional staff and counselors working for or in tandem with churches?
    If there are a large number of suicides happening within evangelical churches, how can it be said they are simultaneously unwelcoming of the broken?
    Are all suicides a result of mental illness?

    Ed Stetzer in his article today on CNN’s site wrote, “Matthew had the best medical care available, a loving church that cared for him and his family, and parents who loved and prayed for him. Yet, that could not keep Matthew with us.”
    And yet, the article’s next 2 bulleted points were: “1. Churches need to stop hiding mental illness” and “2. The congregation should be a safe place for those who struggle.” Which one is it? Is the church at fault, or is there nothing that could have been done?
    Mr. Murray quotes:
    “Trying to locate blame is not usually helpful when seeking to understand why a person has chosen to take his life”
    And then at the end of the article he says:
    “Judgment Day alone will declare how many people took their lives because they were too frightened of the condemnation that would be heaped upon them in the church if they admitted to struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts.”
    Which one is it? Is the church to blame, or is blame unhelpful?
    If you were an outsider to the church, based on this article you might think the belief that those who commit suicide are damned is prevalent within the church, and yet while this may be a question asked by some evangelicals, I have never heard any evangelical leader promote this thought.
    Why aren’t we asking questions such as, “Is there a larger culture of death (i.e. euthanasia, abortion, violence) that makes the thought of suicide more acceptable and pravalent?” or “Do we inadvertently make suicide more appealling by glorifying it and ignoring the selfishness of it?” (This was actually a question posed in an excellent article on suicide a couple of years back by World Magazine.)
    I am not trying to be provacative or insensitive in any way, I just see a tendency in the aftermath of tragedies for evangelicals to attack themselves. It seems to be our first reponse.
    I guess we’re looking at a different evangelical church, because the churches I see are tripping over themselves to welcome the broken and hurting and are very aware of current sociological issues and are trying hard to help.
    While there is always a chance to do more, I do not think that means the church is to blame.

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  • http://thenface2face.wordpress.com Karen Butler

    I disagree with you about the “single biggest thing” we can do to prevent suicide. This is copied from a comment at TGC, but I thought you should hear it, too.

    When I was a suicidal from post-partum depression, it was the heroic hospitality of my best friend that saved my life. God told her I needed rest, and so she took all my five kids to stay with her, save the newborn, and so I got the bedrest and reflective time I needed. She interceded for me. I also journalled and prayed, and God delivered me.

    She did this ministry to me at great cost to herself, as she was grieving the loss of her own stillborn son, just three months earlier.

    I think hospitality, this kind of selfless service, to those who are lonely, to those suffering mental disorder, are the *real* single biggest thing the church can do to reduce the suicide rate. It is why I have revived that discipline in my own life, and I am rediscovering the truth, that “he who refreshes others, refreshes himself.” (Proverbs 11:25)

    Because sometimes it is this feeling that we are cut off from the body that is at the heart of our pain, we who struggle with depression must war against that feeling, and do what seems counter-intuitive: Seek out fellowship. Stop avoiding and hiding from people. Open up, and be transparent, and share the truth about your struggle. It was not till I called my friend, and told her the truth about my suicidal thoughts, that there was finally relief from their demonic torments.

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Karen, I actually agree with you about the priority of friendship, hospitality, and fellowship. I actually think it would happen a lot more if “the single greatest thing” was in place. Wonderful you had such a friend who took such a holistic view of your suffering and in such a sacrificial way.

      • http://thenface2face.wordpress.com Karen Butler

        Och,you stubborn Scotsman! I am so glad I so highly respect you, or I would be tempted to, I don’t know, box your ears or something. But I wouldn’t really do it, as I’ve only read about it. Tell me, how does one ‘box ears’?

        I do know how to cook! Maybe we should have a pot of tea, a plate of warm oatmeal scones, and a chat? A virtual cuppa right now? Because I am sorry that you see me as your depression gadfly, and it dismays me that I may be adding to your stress — thus the levity!

        Can I admit to ‘mental disorder’ rather than ‘mental illness’? I certainly can, because then we won’t be tempted to exchange our rich biblical birthright for Psychiatry’s mess of potage. You are a tightfisted Scotman, why is it that you can’t see the economy of God’s putting the lonely in families with yummy dinners in happy homes? Rather than labeling them ‘mentally ill’ and putting them in expensive psych wards and dosing them with overpriced and bitter pills?

        Pharmaceutical Psychiatry is a messy and very bad porridge, indeed. Spit it out, Dr. Murray! Like Dr. Mickey Nardo, who apolgizes eloquently here for not doing more to protect psych patients, other than resigning in protest from his Academic position when the juggernaut of Big Pharma crushed therapeutic Psychiatry. I stopped demonizing Psychiatrists when I read Dr. Mickey! How I wish I had run into someone like him when my girls were teetering on the edge! He says,

        “I think it’s time for the body of Psychiatry to look back on the last thirty years, particularly the last twenty, and acknowledge that there has been a lot of just outright wrong: producing and accepting lousy science; signing on to lousy science produced by others; colluding with the Pharmaceutical Industry in recommendations and prescriptions; corruption involving ghost-writing, guest authoring, conflicts of interest, direct drug promotion, downplaying or ignoring adverse effects. And then there were some really big sins – TMAP comes to mind. It’s a great big collective blemish, maybe more like an open festering wound. And yet I can’t really seem to talk about it without laying the blame elsewhere – PHARMA, Managed Care, KOLs, Neuroscientists, Psychopharmacologists, the Analysts [before I became one], the DSM committees, the APA. And it’s hard to say I’m sorry to patients harmed, without quickly adding, “but I didn’t do that with my patients.”

        Even though that last comment is true in so far as I know it, it still doesn’t help with a background discomfort that lingers, transcending any disavowals that pass through my mind.” More here: http://1boringoldman.com/index.php/2012/02/20/no-further-comment/

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  • sofia

    I since young been lonely & hurt in all ways. I went to church since young & prayed but always felt rejected & still do. I also suffer from seizures disorder & felt how people would call me slow. I once overdose myself at 13 cause my dad passed & my mother left us. Since then I attempted more cause I feel God hates me & family members has put me down. I now live in a room & hate myself

    • http://headhearthand.org/blog/ David Murray

      Sofia, I’m very, very sorry for your suffering. You have certainly had a very hard life so far. However, God can turn the worst situations around. He can being you into a wonderful experience of His light and love through Jesus Christ. I would love to put you in touch with a local church or a Gospel minister in your area if you tell me roughly where you live. You can email me using the “Contact Us” details at the top of this page. Please don’t give up. I’ve seen God do amazing things in many lives like yours.

      • Dennis Hulick

        What of the aftermath of a loved one’s suicide? How does a christian deal with the truth of an unbelieving loved one being dead but the family members believing the deceased is in Heaven with their deceased loved ones, free from pain, despair, and torment? The loved ones don’t want to hear the truth unless it is their own truth constructed for their own comfort

    • Robyn Teunissen

      Sofia, I have been on the brink of suicide myself and I clung to God for dear life. He is the only reason I’m still here. Please know that God loves you So much! I had to stop looking for the “feeling” of his love and embrace the “knowing.” God is bigger than our problems, he is bigger than the people who put us down, he is SO big, and loves You so very much! If you have a bible, perhaps you could try and read His word. It can give you great comfort. His words, “Be still and know that I am God,” can give you peace. Trust that through your pain you may be able to help someone else and your experiences and sadness will allow you to have mercy on others and compassion. May God Bless you Sofia and may you experience the peace and joy that only God can provide.

      • David Schout

        Hi everybody. Thanks to David Murray for posting the article, and to the responders. I dind’t get a chance to read all of them, but wanted to write a little anyway.

        As someone who has struggled with mental illness and depression for many years, I have gone to many different counselors, and still feel I haven’t really healed since my life fell apart since leaving for college some 15 years ago. (plus I nearly died while in graduate school, though I never actually attempted suicide–praise the Lord!)

        This may shock many people, but here it is: most Christian counseling doesn’t work. (notice I said “most” instead of “all”). I believe this is for two reasons. Mostly, there is a false notion of forgiveness held by many counselors and pastors. If someone stole my very expensive car, would I just say “well, it’s okay because I need to forgive”? Of course not. I would seek justice and get the car back. Mosaic law (and much of Jewish law carries over into Christianity) states that if someone steals something, he is to return twice what was stolen. Yet counselors tend to tell us to simply forgive, forget, and get on with our life. Sure, we won’t always win battles, but the serenity prayer goes: “Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” If we never have the courage to at least try to seek restoration and justice, then we will always be depressed. The fact of the matter is, oftentimes Christian and the church can and do hurt us more than non-Christians and structures other than the church.

        Also, far too many people stay in dysfunctional structures–family, the church, people, work-places, etc. To the extent it is possible, we must leave these dysfunctinoal structures. Does a girl who is date-rapted go on a date with the same guy the next weekend? No. But yet far too many of us act that way regarding our relationships. And why wouldn’t we? Our counselors never tell us to leave these dysfunctional relationships. We are told to forgive. We change, but nobody else does, and nobody else will. All too often, the advice given is not enough.

        In sum, I think many people need a good, honest, ethical, not-in-it-for-the-money attorney than they do a counselor. To date, the best resources I know to consult on this is the book by Ken Sande entitled “The Peacemaker”. In it he states guidelines for when and if we should seek litigation.

        Grace and Peace,

        Dave Schout

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  • http://www.jamespatrickwatson.com/ It’s No Secret, The Christians Guide to God’s Law of Attraction

    It’s No Secret, The Christians Guide to God’s Law of Attraction
    There are four basic areas in life that all must remain in balance. Those four areas consist of your Spiritual life, your Physical life, (fitness), your Relational life. And your Financial Life. It is important to realize that we are never in perfect balance. We will always be leaning one way or another what I am getting at here is that in today’s world we tend to be tilted more than is healthy. That is the purpose of this website and my mission to help people gain a sense of balance in their live’s…..
    Go To:>> http://www.jamespatrickwatson.com/

  • http://suicidalchristians.com Nita Tarr

    As a survivor of multiple suicide attempts I relate to pain and understand suffering. But I could not accept that a loving God would allow this, so I went on a quest to find answers and freedom. I write about how I have survived abuse, addiction, rape, kidnapping and murder in my book: “Suicidal Christians”. I hope that if you are confused about being suicidal while you are a Christian…you will relate to my story and find hope.

  • Retired_Marine

    The only thing which has stopped me multiple time was the belief I would lose my salvation.