Blogs

What’s the Compassionate Approach to the Transgender Bathroom Debate
“When we provide preferential treatment to a segment of society based on an individual’s choice to identify as a gender other than his or her biological sex at birth, we’re ignoring who really needs our protection: children. They haven’t asked for this, they aren’t demanding safety, but they should expect that we will fight for their protection. ”

The Flow of the Psalms | Gentle Reformation
“Robertson’s thesis is that we shouldn’t treat the Psalms like Hershey’s Kisses – beautifully, individually wrapped treats that have no relationship to one another. He argues that there is a flow to the Psalter, a very deliberate, sophisticated arrangement and a logical progression over the course of the 150 ancient songs that were collected together over several centuries.”

How Do I Preach Expository Sermons from Proverbs?
Good tips on how to preach from Proverbs.

Encourage Our Soldiers with Truth
Support the military by supporting military chaplains:

As part of our mission to proclaim the holiness of God to as many people as possible, Ligonier Ministries wants to help edify the men and women serving in the military and to proclaim the gospel to those service members who may never have heard it. Our program to provide resources to U.S. military chaplains is a vital part of this effort.

How a Small, Country Congregation Became a Megachurch Overnight
Here’s how your congregation can become a megachurch overnight.

Retreats for Pastors – Top 20 Getaway List
A list of 20 retreats and getaways for Pastors

Imagine No Possessions, Imagine Venezuela
Venezuela needs our prayers:

Venezuela has some of the world’s largest supplies of oil, with more proven oil reserves than Saudi Arabia. But about 15 years ago, the late president Hugo Chavez set out to impose a socialist revolution, making a particular point about his great munificence in providing free health care for everyone. In pursuit of this revolution, Chavez crushed every industry outside the oil sector and brought the state-owned oil company under his control. The result has been a long spiral into poverty and oppression. Now we can see the results: socialism literally kills babies.

Kindle Books

Signs of the Spirit: An Interpretation of Jonathan Edwards’ “Religious Affection” by Sam Storms $2.99.

How and When to Teach your Kids about Sex by Stan and Brena Jones $3.99.

Thoughts for Young Men by J C Ryle

Blogs

J.K. Rowling shares powerful message about Donald Trump | M. J. Franklin, Mashable
A surprisingly sane and honest liberal voice is heard in Muggle world:

If my offended feelings can constitute a travel ban on Donald Trump, I have no moral grounds on which to argue that those offended by feminism or the fight for transgender rights or universal suffrage should not oppress campaigners for those causes. If you seek the removal of freedoms from an opponent simply on the grounds that they have offended you, you have crossed a line to stand along tyrants who imprison, torture and kill on exactly the same justification.

Martin Luther On Depression | Allan Adams, More Than Coping
“I’d like to drive home the point that depression and other mental illnesses are not an indictment on the person who is experiencing them.  I’m following up words Charles Spurgeon had to say with another giant of the faith, Martin Luther.  It is a fascinating read when you consider that Martin Luther came to his conclusions hundreds of years ago!  Maybe somebody needs to nail some of his observations to a few doors.  The fact that Luther counseled those who were afflicted with a non judgmental attitude is amazing. ”

Answering This Generation’s Question of Essential Identity | Barry York, Gentle Reformation
“These cultural battles may be defining new, necessary starting points of our discussion regarding true identity. Yet the ending place of finding it in the true God-man is still the same.”

A Transgendered Thought Experiment | Kevin DeYoung, TGC
What if people treated eating disorders the same way we’re opting to treat those who identify as transgendered?

Blue-Collar Contentment | Hannah Anderson, ChristianityToday.com
“Ultimately, learning to surrender to God’s providence doesn’t mean that we won’t work hard, take opportunities when they come, or pursue the prosperity of our families and communities. But it does mean that we understand who is ultimately in control of where we (and our children) land on the socioeconomic scale. It means remembering that we must walk the path that God has called us to, not the path he has called our neighbor to or the path that we believe we deserve.”

8 Arguments for Why You Should Be Anxious Today (and How the Bible Responds) | Justin Taylor, TGC
“Unbelief does not just offer dictates; it offers reasons why we don’t need to trust the Lord. And to counter that, gospel-flavored belief argues with our unbelief. In other words, it provides reasons for why trusting the Lord is always the good and wise things to do. ”

What Can Pastors Learn from Donald Trump? | Erik Raymond, TGC
“I am not suggesting that we necessarily learn from Donald Trump in terms of homiletics or public speaking, however, I am suggesting that we as pastors can learn something from the phenomenon that is Donald Trump. We can learn about the people that we reaching and endeavoring to reach with the gospel; and we can be reminded of the pitfalls of aiming to cater to them.”

The Power of Public Prayer in the Church | Kent Hughes, Westminster Theological Seminary
“The immense importance of the corporate prayers of the body of Christ rests on Scripture’s direct accounts of the power wrought by such prayers and the apostolic dependence on the prayers of the church.”

New Book

Strong and Weak: Embracing a Life of Love, Risk and True Flourishing by Andy Crouch

Kindle Deals

For your non-Kindle book buying needs please consider using Reformation Heritage Books in the USA and Reformed Book Services in Canada. Good value prices and shipping.

The Art of Work: A Proven Path to Discovering What You Were Meant to Do by Jeff Goins ($2.99)

Grounded in the Gospel: Building Believers the Old-Fashioned Way by J. I. Packer and Gary A. Parrett ($2.99)

The God Who Justifies by James R. White ($3.99)

Video

How to Balance Being a Husband and a Father | Crossway

How to Balance Being a Husband and a Father from Crossway on Vimeo.

While we all crave inner peace, and recognize that the Holy Spirit is its only source (Isa. 32:15-17), we often fail to really grasp how it’s produced in the soul. Yes, the Holy Spirit gives peace, but He uses means; He uses different ingredients to produce this inner tranquility, ingredients that can be cultivated and mixed together, some of which are identified below.

The peace of forgiveness instead of guilt. Forgiveness quietens the disturbing dread of just judgment for our sin.

The peace of friendship instead of fear. God used to be a terrifying enemy to us, but now He is our Father and even our best friend.

The peace of acceptance instead of rejection. Before faith, no matter how hard we tried to please God, we were rightly rejected and resisted. But after faith, we are 100% accepted in Christ. The striving and struggling is over.

The peace of doing what I can instead of doing what I can’t (Mark. 14:8). I can stop trying to be a Martha and enjoy being a Mary (Luke 10:42). Instead of spending life rushed off my feet, I can sit calmly at Jesus’s feet.

The peace of God-glorifying instead of self-seeking. Calm comes when we give up on self-promotion and aim only at God-promotion.

The peace of love instead of hate. Before regeneration we are full of malice and ill-will. But love stills that ugly storm and sends gentle ripples through the soul.

The peace of peace-making instead of vengeance-taking. No longer do I have to get even. Vengeance is God’s – I give it all over to His repayment department.

The peace of contentment instead of envy. When I never have enough, I never have serenity. When I am content, I know peace that passes understanding.

The peace of presence instead of loneliness. No matter how alone I am, I am never lonely, because God is with me everywhere.

The peace of patience instead of impatience. We no longer get agitated and annoyed at every delay, but rather wait calmly on God’s better timing. His clock is more accurate than mine.

The peace of trust instead of worry. I don’t need to worry about tomorrow, or the next day, or the next year. I don’t need to worry about what I eat, drink, or put on. Father says, “I got this.”

The peace of purpose instead of aimlessness. Instead of zig-zagging, tacking, chopping, and changing my way through life, never knowing what I should do, I now have a God-given purpose, aim, and significance.

The peace of obedience rather than rebellion. Disobedience results in chaos. Obedience results in harmony.

The peace of identity rather than confusion. In a world that cannot even tell the difference between male and female, I can have the peace of a God-given identity in Christ.

The peace of submission rather than control. When my kids, my work, or my church don’t go according to my plan, I don’t fight it but rather I hand it all over to God and submit to His much better plan.

The peace of optimism instead of pessimism. I look ahead and hope instead of panic, because God holds the future in His hands.

The peace of kingdom-focus rather than republic-obsession. When I am obsessed with politics I am stressed in my heart for the future of the nation. When I am obsessed with God’s kingdom I see that this kingdom will come and His will, not my will, will be done.

If you want more inner calm and tranquility, put more of these spiritual ingredients in the mix and ask the Holy Spirit to bake peace into your soul.

As part of the series on spiritual abuse I’m beginning to collect resources and make them available on this page. If you have any other recommendations you can either email them to me or leave a comment. You can find more recommended resources on a variety of subjects here.

Books

Suffering and the Heart of God: How Trauma Destroys and Christ Restores by Diane Langberg.

The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse: Recognizing and Escaping Spiritual Manipulation and False Spiritual Authority Within the Church by David Johnson and Jeff VanVonderen.

Healing Spiritual Abuse: How to Break Free from Bad Church Experience by Ken Blue.

Exposing Spiritual Abuse by Mike Fehlauer.

Spiritual Abuse: Religion at Its Worst by June Hunt.

Spiritual Abuse Recovery: Dynamic Research on Finding a Place of Wholeness by Barbara M. Orlowski.

Faith That Hurts, Faith That Heals/Understanding the Fine Line Between Healthy Faith and Spiritual Abuse by Stephen Arterburn and Jack Felton.

The following books are more about spiritual and emotional abuse in marriage, but many of the principles apply to abusive churches too.

The Emotionally Destructive Relationship: Seeing It, Stopping It, Surviving It by Leslie Vernick.

A Cry for Justice: How the Evil of Domestic Abuse Hides in Your Church by Jeff Crippen and Anna Wood.

Safe People: How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren’t by Henry Cloud

The following are secular books but still many helpful observations.

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft.

In Sheep’s Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People by George K. Simon.

Rethinking Narcissism: The Bad-and Surprising Good-About Feeling Special by Dr. Craig Malkin.

The following are out of print but may still be purchased used.

Recovering from Churches that Abuse by Ronald Enroth (or download Free PDF)

Recovery from Spiritual Abuse by Juanita and Dale Ryan

Blogs

HeadHeartHand Series

A Reformed “Spotlight”: Fighting Spiritual Abuse in the Reformed Church | HeadHeartHand

Reformed “Spotlight”: What is Spiritual Abuse? | HeadHeartHand

Reformed “Spotlight”: 10 Characteristics of Mr Controller | HeadHeartHand

Reformed “Spotlight”: What about the Victims? | HeadHeartHand

Reformed “Spotlight”: The Humblest Conference I’ve Ever Attended | HeadHeartHand

Reformed “Spotlight”: Self-Promoting Wolves or Selfless Shepherds | HeadHeartHand

Phil Monroe Series

Spiritual Trauma and Abuse: Assessments and Interventions | Phil Monroe

Spiritual Abuse: What it is and Why it Hurts | Phil Monroe

Why do some spiritual leaders abuse power? | Phil Monroe

What factors support the use of spiritual abuse? | Phil Monroe

Why are some people prone to spiritual abuse? | Phil Monroe

Belief System Supports for Spiritual Abuse? |Phil Monroe

Do you enable spiritual abuse? | Phil Monroe

Preventing spiritual abuse? Listen to that little voice plus |Phil Monroe

Spiritual Trauma and Abuse: Assessments and Intervention | Phil Monroe

Other Blogs

The Narcissism Test

Pastoral Bullies | Sam Storms

Spiritual Abuse: What it is and why it hurts | Phil Monroe

Warning: Dangerous people | Wisdom for life

Evangelicals and Toxic Masculinity | Samuel D. James

Reflections on Fallen Pastors |Timothy Raymond 

What is Spiritual ABUSE? | Geeky Christian

Spiritual Abuse | David Henke

Spiritual Abuse: It’s Not Just Celebrity Pastors | Gentle Reformation

How Church Bullies and Abusers Deceive Us « The Reformed Reader

Help in Overcoming Church Hurt | Desiring God

Podcasts

Culture, Christendom, and Christ with Diane Langberg.

Are We Pastors or Platform Builders? | Mortification of Spin

It’s good to see that The Journey church has set up a Member & Attender Support Page. No doubt this must be a time of spiritual crisis for many in the congregation as they try to understand how a beloved pastor can sin so grievously. I personally know the tremendous confusion and distress that results when a preacher that God has greatly blessed in your life falls into sin. Many questions arise: Was I deceived? Is it all a deception? Was the blessing a delusion? Are other preachers just the same? Who can I trust? Why would God use such men to bless so many people? Was God not able to stop him from falling?

In such painful and puzzling circumstances a support page is a good pastoral use of technology. I especially liked the way that various preachers were invited to send living and vibrant video messages of pastoral and prayerful support towards the congregation and also to the fallen pastor and his family.

But, there’s something vital missing from all this. What about the victims? According to the church’s letter to their members, the pastor had hurt many people along the way over many years. His sins included:

• Refusal of personal accountability (I Pet. 5.1)
• Lack of self-control (I Tim. 3.2)
• Manipulation and lying.
• Domineering over those in his charge (I Pet. 5.3)
• Misuse of power/authority (I Pet. 5.3)

Each of these sins involves a victim, perhaps many, and most of these wounded sheep will now be scattered across many churches, or perhaps even churchless through disillusionment. But watch the videos and read the statements. You would think these were victimless sins. Yes, the pastor and his family need prayer and support, but the victims need it first and foremost.

I’m not picking on The Journey, it’s just that this gives such a sadly typical example of the way most churches ignore or forget the victims. Usually it’s not done deliberately, but rather thoughtlessly. Oftentimes, it’s because the victims have moved on and are no longer part of the church. Sometimes, crisis-management is just so focused on survival that the wider consequences are not thought through. But it’s also possible that the same celebrity-worship that contributed to the pastor’s fall is still skewing extra pastoral attention to him to the omission of the lesser-known victims.

One way to put this right would be to post a “Victim Support Page” with similar videos, but this time directed towards these bleeding sheep for whom this disciplinary intervention came too late. Whatever support and care is being poured into the pastor and his family, the victims deserve double that. And if the victims can face it, the pastor himself should be involved in reaching out to each and every victim to ask for forgiveness before any consideration is given to any future ministry role.

Yes the pastor needs grace. But the victims need justice.

Other posts in this series here.

Our enemy says, “Youth for pleasure, middle age for business, old age for religion.” The Bible says, “Youth, middle age, and old age for your Creator.”

But as it’s especially in our youth that we are most inclined (determined?) to forget our Creator, it’s especially in these years that we must work to remember our Creator (Ecc.12:1). Remember that He made you, that He provides for you, that He cares for you, that He watches you, that He controls you; and remember that He can save you too. That’s a lot to remember, but it’s much easier to start memorizing when we are young!

1. Energetic Years
That, however, is not the only reason why God commands us to remember our Creator in our young years. It’s also because these are our most energetic years.

Why wait until we are pegging out, until we are running down, until our gas is almost empty, before serving our Creator? The God who made us deserves our most active and healthy years: our bodies are strong and muscular (well kind of), our minds are sharp and clear, our senses are receptive and keen and sensitive, our enthusiasm is bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, our wills are steely and determined. Remember Him in your energetic years.

2. Sensitive Years
Why do far more of us become Christians in our youth than in our middle or old age? It’s because youthful years are sensitive years. Without giving up our belief in “Total Depravity” we can say that it’s “easier” to believe and repent when we are younger. It’s never easy, but it’s easier. And it’s easier because as we get older our heart is hardened thicker, our conscience is seared number, our sins root deeper, our deadness becomes deader.

Let’s use our youthful sensitivity and receptivity to remember our Creator before the evil days of callous indifference set in.

3. Teachable Years
We learn more in our youth than in any other period of life. That’s true in all subjects, but especially true in religious instruction. All the Christians I’ve met who were converted to Christ late in life have expressed huge regrets about how little they know and how little they can now learn. I encourage them to value and use whatever time the Lord gives them, but they often feel they have to study twice as hard to learn half as well.

4. Dangerous Years
Young years are minefield years: hormones, peer pressure, alcohol, drugs, pornography, immorality, testosterone, etc. Few navigate these years without blowing up here and there. Dangers abound on every side – and on the inside. How many “first” temptations become “last” temptations! How much we need our Creator to keep us and carry us through this battlefield.

Remember to Remember
Let me then give you some helps to remember your Creator during these best of years (and “worst” of years):

• Be persuaded that you have a Creator: Get well grounded in a literal understanding of Genesis 1-2 and shun all evolutionary influences.
• Get to know your Creator: Study His Word using sermons, commentaries, and good books. But also study His World using microscopes and telescopes and any other instruments He gives.
• Join with your Creator’s friends: Build friendships with other creatures that love to remember and respect their Creator.
• Follow your Creator’s order: He set and gave the pattern of six days work followed by one day of rest for contemplation of His Works.
• Ask for your Creator’s salvation: Even if your rejection of your Creator has broken you in pieces, He’s willing to re-create you in His image.

And while we’re on the subject of salvation, I don’t want elderly readers to be discouraged. Compared to the aeons of eternity, you are still in your “youth.” It’s not too late to remember Him, before these evil days come even nearer.

Extracted from The Christian Life.