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Blogs

The Four Horsemen of Divorce
The Four Horsemen are criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling and contempt.

Is God All You Need?
“In this article, Scott Hubbard shares some thoughts about the statement “All I need is God.” He writes, “Throughout Scripture, God’s people often need more than God alone—they need God through the things he has made.”

Is Boasting on Social Media a Sin?
“When we engage through a screen, something changes. Put an iPhone in people’s hands, and words they would not dare say in person they will eagerly tweet or post as a comment. Digitally mediated communication has led to digitally mindless communication. We don’t think before we speak online. We sit in front of a keyboard and deceive ourselves, suppressing the knowledge of God’s presence and assuming we are alone. But we are not alone on social media. God is there. And so is a potential audience of billions of people.”

How America (and the Church) Can Support Blue-Collar Workers
So good to see this at TGC.

Sleep and Body Composition
“The amount of good sleep a body gets is in direct relation to maintaining a healthy diet and muscle to body fat ratio.”

How to overcome your excuses for not prioritizing sleep
“There are a lot of obstacles to achieve a good night’s sleep–but there are also many ways you can choose to overcome them. Experiment with different tactics and tools to optimize your sleep, and make the most of your waking hours. Even one small change can make a big difference.”

Why you are still not sleeping well at night
“Some of the often ignored factors that contribute to sleeplessness, as well as some fixes that can help you get back into a solid sleep routine.”

Going to church is America’s key to long and happy lives
The General Social Survey finds that 50 percent of Americans who go to church more than once a week call themselves “very happy.” That number drops as church attendance drops, down to only 25 percent for those who go once a year or less.

Lessons Learned from a Leadership Nightmare
“I’ve been a local church pastor for more than thirty years, but I’ve never had a year like 2018. Honestly, it was brutal, far and away the most difficult season I’ve ever had in ministry. I experienced a church leader’s nightmare.​ Through a grueling five-month process, we ended up removing a vocational elder from our team due to repeated instances of inappropriate conduct. He ended up losing his job, his ministry, and his church. It was extremely difficult for everyone involved.​

This elder had been a friend of mine for forty years. We started the church together. We ministered alongside each other for decades. We teamed up to lead the church and staff together. ​But one evening, I had to tell him it was over. He was out. After thirty years, he was no longer a pastor here. We were done.​ The whole process was excruciating, and that final conversation with my unrepentant friend was weird, awkward, and painful. Many nights I just sat in my study and stared at the ceiling for hours, trying to pray and wondering how in the world our church was going to survive this. ​But, by God’s grace, we did survive. I survived too, somehow. God was good to us and we’re still here. But it was rough.​ As I’ve reflected on this experience several truths have emerged that help me to process the whole ordeal.”

Kindle Books

Alive in Him: How Being Embraced by the Love of Christ Changes Everything by Gloria Furman $1.59.

Putting Amazing Back into Grace: Embracing the Heart of the Gospel by Michael Horton $1.59.


Snapshots of Joy from our Son’s Wedding

We had our first family wedding last Friday, with my eldest son Allan marrying a lovely Christian girl, Lynnae Doll. Hope these pictures share some of our joy.

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Allan and Lynnae, our four other “kids”, my parents, Shona and I.

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Shona and I with Allan and Lynnae.

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Our five “children” with Lynnae.

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Our oldest and youngest sons. Scot was the “Secret Service” Ring Bearer.

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My parents all the way from Scotland, with Allan and Lynnae.

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Our daughters, Joni and Amy, with our son, Angus.


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Blogs

Sex Abuse Among Southern Baptists
Some quality analysis of the systemic issues that lead churches and church leaders to make such bad decisions in handling such cases:

“Second, we’ve failed to understand the power dynamics of abuse and have often viewed these instances through the lens of sexual sin. This led to abusers being superficially reprimanded and penalized, while the survivors were simultaneously overlooked and/or treated as complicit. Such a reductionist understanding gave rise to unrighteous sympathy that sought to protect the future of the perpetrator at the expense of justice and protection of the victim. Then, when survivors would not let the injustice go, they were characterized as troublemakers—unwilling to “forgive” their abusers. ”

Addressing Abuse in the SBC: A Proposal
Here’s another.

“Calling a survivor of sexual assault into a minister’s office in order to be cross-examined by pastoral staff should never have been seen as acceptable, and now, we must make it clear that is complicit behavior. In order to protect vulnerable survivors, we need to appoint survivor advocates.

Statement from R. Albert Mohler Jr. on Sovereign Grace Churches
And here’s one beginning to put things right.

“As many are aware, I have recently apologized and asked forgiveness for serious errors I made in how I responded to concerns that were raised about Sovereign Grace Churches and CJ Mahaney.”

Pastor, Preach like Hurt Women Are Listening
“I’ve been blessed over the years to sit under the loving care of wise and compassionate pastors and elders. I’ve witnessed great humility in these men as they’ve listened to my story and grown in wisdom and understanding in their pastoral care for women. It hasn’t always been perfect, and we have hurt and misunderstood each other. But they did a few things that ministered to me and other women in our church.”

Is Email Making Professors Stupid?
Yep.

“When email first spread to campuses in the late 1970s, it simplified crucial tasks like communicating with distant collaborators, but as its ubiquity grew, it became a public portal through which the world beyond close colleagues could make increasing demands on a professor’s time and attention, making email into a kind of digital water torture for the scholar struggling to think without interruption.”

The Complete Guide to Memory
Perhaps part of the remedy to the above. What a phenomenal resource from Scott Young:

“How does your memory work? How can you remember more? Prevent forgetting? These questions lie at the heart of anything you’ll ever learn, do or experience. Your memory impacts everything you do, from how well you’ll do in school, your career, life and even your sense of self and happiness. This is a topic that has long fascinated me, and I’ve written a lot about memory previously on this blog. However, I wanted to create a guide that would combine and integrate everything we know scientifically about memory, and distill that knowledge into practical advice.”

Broken Pieces and the God Who Mends Them
Bill Boekestein’s excellent review of Simonetta Carr’s new book about her family’s painful struggle with mental illness. Here’s another from Redeemed Reader.

Books

Disruptive Witness: Speaking Truth in a Distracted Age by Alan Noble $3.99.

Run to Win: The Lifelong Pursuits of a Godly Man by Tim Challies $5.99.

Side by Side: Walking with Others in Wisdom and Love by Edward T. Welch $2.39.

Video

Puritan Trailer


Expedition 38: The Darkest Trial

Here’s the video for Expedition 38 in Exploring the Bible. If you want to bookmark a page where all the videos are posted, you can find them on my blog, on YouTube, or the Facebook page for Exploring the Bible.

If you haven’t started your kids on the book yet, you can begin anytime and use it with any Bible version. Here are some sample pages.

You can get it at RHBWestminster BooksCrossway, or Amazon. If you’re in Canada use Reformed Book Services. Some of these retailers have good discounts for bulk purchases by churches and schools.


Real Men Have One Aim

This is the second video in the Christian Man Academy Curriculum. For a transcript, click through to the Christian Man Academy website.

This video is all about finding our ultimate purpose in life. Why are we here and what will make us happy while we are here?

If we aim at God above all, and glorify God above all, we will enjoyGod above all else. We can only enjoy God if he is number one in our lives.

You can sign up for our weekly newsletter here or subscribe to the YouTube Channel to be notified of the latest videos.


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Blogs

Sexual Abuse in SBC
Joe Carter summarizes this tragedy in an FAQ. Important articles to read by J D Greear, Russell Moore, Al Mohler. One of Mohler’s conclusions is:

In light of this report and the nature of sexual abuse, an independent, third-party investigation is the only credible avenue for any organizations that face the kind of sinful patterns unearthed in this article by the Houston Chronicle. No Christian body, church, or denomination can investigate itself on these terms because such an investigation requires a high level of thoroughness and trustworthiness. Only a third-party investigator can provide that kind of objective analysis.

Trillia Newbell offers 6 Ways Pastors Can Help Victims of Sexual Assault.

And here is some beauty among the ashes: How I found hope after my ex-husband was convicted of sexual abuse.

Our Digital Lives Don’t Need to Make Us Unhappy, Unhealthy, and Unwise
“Now is the moment to pursue a three-pronged approach to all digital encounters: literacy, hygiene, and labeling. We have the opportunity of a lifetime to re-shape our still primitive and often unruly digital culture into a safer, healthier, more rewarding domain.”

Finally, a Biblical Marriage Counseling Primer!
“If you are a pastor, biblical counselor, or anyone who walks with couples, get Counsel for Couples. I am confident it will not stay on your bookshelf, but be a well-worn resource as you care for and counsel couples.”

Is My Boyfriend’s Porn a Marriage Deal-Breaker?
“I would say, “Yeah, that is a deal-breaker.” …And I would say, “Don’t lower the bar.” I think we have lowered the bar too much. We have treated men like dogs in heat rather than men who are created in the image of God and who have the Holy Spirit, whose fruit is love, joy, and self-control. That last one, self-control, is usually used in relation to sexuality. Men are not victims, and these women have a right to expect more from us.”

Don’t Put Your Hope in Date Night
“When we falsely believe a date night out is the only way to grow in marriage, enjoy one another, foster intimacy, and maintain a healthy commitment, we’re bound to continually feel defeated and disappointed. God is gracious to provide many ways for couples to connect and grow deeper in their love for one another beyond a night out. In fact, date-night dry seasons might be the times we best reveal the beauty of our covenant, as we steadfastly love and serve each other in difficult times.”

“Gospel of the Happy God”
“Real happiness is the blessedness of God. Real happiness, the gospel of freedom and salvation and liberation and transformation, is when humans in all their need come under the care of the happy God who has no needs whatsoever, and who undertakes to pay the price of bringing us into fellowship with his own blessedness.”

Why you should make your pastor take a sabbatical
Some great resources here for pastors, elders, and congregations.

Books

Manhood Restored by Eric Mason $1.99.

God’s Wisdom for Navigating Life: A Year of Daily Devotions in the Book of Proverbs by Timothy Keller $1.99.

Video

The Most Significant Lessons We’ve Learned as Parents