I’ve been working through What did you expect? with a young couple. Although I was initially a bit disappointed, the book has grown on me and, I must say, chapter six on forgiveness was absolutely outstanding. I’ve never seen so much clear, concise and life-changing teaching on forgiveness in one chapter. Tripp begins by saying:

Healthy marriages are healthy because the people in those marriages find joy in cancelling debts. I cannot think of a more essential ingredient in marriage than forgiveness [86].

Forgiveness is a vertical commitment that is followed by a horizontal transaction….Forgiveness begins by your giving the offense to the Lord. This does not mean that you act as if something wrong is right. It means that you do not carry the wrong with you (bitterness), and that you do not treat the other in light of the wrong (judgment). You entrust yourself to God’s mercy and justice, and you give yourself to overcoming evil with good…The reason you must start with giving the offense to God is so that when you come to your spouse, you come with the right attitude (grace) and the right goal (reconciliation)… [92-93].

Here’s an outline of the chapter to whet your appetite:

A. The Marriage-damaging stages of the harvest of unforgiveness
1. Immaturity and failure
2. Falling into comfortable patterns
3. Establishing defenses
4. Nurturing dislike
5. Becoming overwhelmed
6. Envy of other couples
7. Fantasies of Escape

B. Then why don’t people just forgive?
1. Debt is power
2. Debt is identity
3. Debt is entitlement
4. Debt is weaponry
5. Debt puts us in God’s position

C. What is forgiveness?
1. Vertical (judicial) forgiveness
2. Horizontal (relational) forgiveness

D. You do not need to ask forgiveness…
1. When you have done something out of human weakness
2. For differences in personality or perspective
3. For attempting to do something and failing

E. What forgiveness requires and returns
1. Forgiveness requires humility
2. Forgiveness requires compassion
3. Forgiveness requires trust
4. Forgiveness requires self-control
5. Forgiveness requires sacrifice
6. Forgiveness requires remembering (our sins)

F. A Better Harvest
1. Forgiveness stimulates appreciation and affection
2. Forgiveness produces patience
3. Forgiveness is the fertile soil in which unity in marriage grows.

Here’s a great way to close an article on information overload:

Life is sweet, but short. Time is all we’ve got, and there are only three things you can do with it. Surrender it to vital functions like eating and sleeping. Sell it as work. And give it to the people and things you choose. Real wealth is owning your time. And ambition for that ownership lifts people out of poverty, creates a middle class, and drives innovation. Information is the currency, and with good information you can eat better, sleep better, seek fulfillment, prosper, pursue your passions and live longer.

One thing’s for sure — there’s a lot of information ahead. The question is, will it make us any smarter?

Graham Button goes on to give “seven home truths to help keep things in perspective” in a world where information is the most abundant commodity on earth. Each of these points is entertainingly expanded here.

1. People crave certainty. Cleveland is the rule, Palo Alto the exception.

2. “Branded Content” Is a Dangerous Road — Drive Responsibly. Facts have never been more available, but we have a bad habit of consuming them like a product.

3. Bet on Humans over Technology. The deeper we bite into the apple — the Garden of Eden apple that the computer company is named after — the further from grace we seem to fall.

4. If You Have Nothing to Say, Don’t. No, Really. In 2008 alone, we gobbled up roughly the amount of information found in thick paperback novels stacked seven feet high over every inch of the country.

5. Privacy Is Becoming Pivotal — Take a Stand. Never forget that the Internet never forgets — it’s always a school night.

6. Information Works for You, Not the Other Way Round. Innovation is something that comes when you’re not under the gun.

I didn’t understand the seventh point. You can try to decipher it here with the rest of the article.

Bob Pozen is chairman emeritus of MFS Investment Management and senior lecturer at Harvard Business School. Those who know him say that he “gets an awful lot accomplished with a minimum of visible effort and stress.”

Here he explains how he trained his kids to be speed readers:

Here’s what I did to teach my kids and nephews to become speed readers. I would see them doing some dense reading such as chapters in a history or science textbook, and I would say: “When you get to the exam in a month or two, what do you want to remember from this chapter? After reading this chapter, please write no more than the one or two paragraphs you want to remember for the exam. Then go back and see how you could read more efficiently to obtain that paragraph or two.”

One of the reasons why some people are slow readers is that they’re reading every word. Instead, they should read the introduction, the conclusions and the tops of the paragraphs to determine if that part of the chapter is really important for them.

But you’ve got to know what you’re reading for. Are you reading for certain facts? Are you reading for new analysis? Are you reading for the author’s general themes or the specific support for these themes?

Seth Godin’s “text“: “Risking the appearance of weakness takes strength. And the market knows it.”

He has ten points of “application.”

Apologize

Defer to others

Avoid shortcuts

Tell the truth

Offer kindness

Seek alliances

Volunteer to take the short straw

Choose the long-term, sacrificing the short

Demonstrate respect to all, not just the obviously strong

Share credit and be public in your gratitude

In what ways does this differ from Christian ethics and morality?

The difference lies not in the “text” or the “application.” The difference is in the areas of motivation and power. The Christian is motivated by Gospel-centered love not by market share. And the Christian is given the power to be weak through the Holy Spirit’s indwelling.

Visit Godin’s blog here.