Blogs

God Made You a Writer: An Invitation to Every Christian | David Mathis, Desiring God
Here’s an encouragement to those feeling called to any kind of writing ministry:

Whether you think of yourself as a writer or not (and on the whole, it might be better if less people did!), I’d love to extend to you God’s invitation to find your ways of proclaiming his excellencies (1 Peter 2:9) in written words.

Treasure Your Marriage | Tim Challies
“If God has given you a wife, he has given you a precious gift. He calls you to treasure your marriage, and to treasure marriage, you must treasure your bride. If you are to treasure your wife, you must learn from Jesus Christ how to love her well. Here are four marks of a husband’s love.*”

Feeding on Christ Diagnostic Decision Making | Nicholas T. Batzig, Feeding on Christ
“There are also a number of questions that we derive from God’s word that help us discern what decision we are to make in any given life situation. In his excellent little book Discovering God’s Will, Sinclair Ferguson set out the following diagnostic questions to ask when we are confronted with numerous life decisions:”

On technology and preaching | Mike Pohlman, Southern Seminary
“If it really is God speaking through the preacher (which it is) then God forbid we miss one word he’s saying. And technology use (whether screens up on the stage or in a listener’s hand via smartphone or tablet) dramatically increases the risk of this happening. ”

My Dark Night of the Soul | Jon Bloom, Desiring God
“For me, it’s fitting that a solar eclipse occurred this week. Twenty years ago, in the spring of 1997, I experienced an eclipse of God. And twenty years ago this week, light dawned in my darkness (Psalm 112:4)…”

“The Life of the Professor” — My Talking Points for our New Faculty Workshop | Jonathan Pennington
Guidance and motivation for teachers beginning another school year:

I was asked earlier this week by the provost here at Southern to come in and speak to our new professors… I put together a brief talk that focuses on three areas of the life of the professor — Teaching, Scholarship, and Mentoring. Here are my far from perfect and far from comprehensive talking points for those who might be interested.

To Faithful Pastors in Forgotten Places | Stephen Witmer, Desiring God

“Dear small-town pastor,

I’m a small-town pastor myself, and I want to spur you on in the ministry. We labor in places we dearly love, but few others have heard of. We have a wide range of responsibilities, which may include (but not be limited to) typing the bulletin, doing pest control for the church building, helping at Vacation Bible School, performing emergency toilet repairs, and preaching.

The conferences we attend, the books, magazines, blogs, and websites we read, and the podcasts we listen to are produced by big-city, large-church pastors. Gradually, though no one has ever said this to us, we may have come to feel like we’re junior varsity. We have not been gifted or called to influence the influencers in the big city. We’re doing the best we can, seeking to be faithful pastors in our forgotten places, but sometimes we may wonder whether we’re missing the real action. If that’s you, I want to encourage you in four ways.”

Think Beauty and Artistry Aren’t Important? Think Again. | Amy Simpson
“…a person who claims beauty, creativity, and quality don’t matter is missing something important about who God is.”

Kindle Books

For your non-Kindle book buying needs please consider using Reformation Heritage Books in the USA and Reformed Book Services in Canada. Good value prices and shipping.

Crazy Busy: A (Mercifully) Short Book about a (Really) Big Problem by Kevin DeYoung ($3.19)

God at Work: Your Christian Vocation in All of Life by Gene Edward Veith Jr. ($3.99)

Work and Our Labor in the Lord by James M. Hamilton Jr. ($3.99)

Blogs

The 8 Questions I Need to Answer Before I Decide to Retire
“Retirement is just another season in life; one filled with both challenges and opportunities. So, as in any stage of life, we can never go wrong if we put God’s kingdom first when making the important decision about when to retire and how we will spend our time once we do.

Podcast: Pastoral Rest | Practical Shepherding
“Listen as Brian Croft and Jim Savastio discuss the often neglected issue of pastoral rest. From the vacation to the day off to the pastoral sabbatical, Brian and Jim explore the biblical necessity of rest and offer practical insights for avoiding pastoral burn-out.”

Leadership and Emotional Intelligence | Tim Lane
“In March of 2015, I pursued certification to use a tool called the Birkman Method to help leaders and teams grow in Emotional Intelligence. In addition to learning how to use this tool to help others, my training also allowed me to grow in greater self-awareness and learn how my own leadership style could be both productive and not so productive given the situation. I wished I had been exposed to this while I was in seminary preparing for leadership in ministry.”

3 Ways to Control Your Phone Addiction on Vacation | Harvard Business Review
“If we want to truly disconnect from everyday pressures and reap the positive benefits of a holiday we need to commit to setting three helpful boundaries.

How “Online” Is Your Prayer Life? | Counseling One Another
“The average adult in the UK spends nearly nine hours of each day on media and communication, outstripping even the amount of time spent sleeping or doing other vital tasks. Over 80 per cent of respondents to the study said the internet makes communicating easier, but a majority also conceded that they were probably “hooked” on the internet and spent longer than intended online each day. On average, we spend a little more than one day each week online (25 hours), with 10 per cent saying that they access the internet more than 50 times each day.”

Christian, What Are You Watching? | Crossway

“As followers of Christ, we cannot afford to take lightly the media’s pervasive presence in our lives. Think about the power of video entertainment, for instance. Whether viewed on computer, a portable player, or a traditional TV set, television and film are without peer in their cultural influence. Ken Myers, an astute Christian observer of popular culture, notes that television is not only “the dominant medium of popular culture” but also “the single most significant shared reality in our entire society.” He compares television’s impact to that of Christianity centuries ago, when “Christendom” defined the Western world:”

When Your Spouse Is Mentally Ill | Christianity Today
“Through the years, I have learned some things about marriage and mental illness that I wished someone would have told me early on. If you or a loved one are facing a similar challenge with mental illness, here are a few important truths.”

Four stages of “evangelical” affirmation of gay marriage | Denny Burk
“I have noticed a pretty consistent progression among those who eventually embrace gay marriage. It goes like this:
(1) Oppose gay-marriage.
(2) Oppose taking a stand on the question.
(3) Affirm gay marriage.
(4) Vilify traditional marriage proponents:”

4 Reasons to Teach Church History to Teens
“Far from being a stagnant collection of dates, movements, and odd-sounding names, the church’s past represents a treasure trove of God-exalting wisdom that helps us navigate the cultural realities of the present.”

God’s Grace in My Anorexia
“If you’d met me 13 years ago, here’s what you’d have seen: A ”successful” Christian, newly married to a pastor in training. The leader of a thriving children’s ministry with a bright future ahead. Someone who seemed to have it all together. But there’s one part you might have missed: a young woman gripped by an eating disorder that would nearly take her life. So how did I get there—and what has changed?”

Kindle Books

Boring: Finding an Extraordinary God in an Ordinary Life by Michael Kelley $2.99.

Health, Wealth & Happiness: Has the Prosperity Gospel Overshadowed the Gospel of Christ? by David Jones $4.12.

The Most Important Place on Earth: What a Christian Home Looks Like and How to Build One by Robert Wolgemuth $2.99.

Blogs

Why Evangelism Requires Both Logic and Loveliness | Holly Ordway, Christianity Today
“The classic rational arguments for Christian faith—based on evidence, philosophy, and history—are as sound as ever, but they are effective only when people are interested in the questions and find our words and ideas meaningful. Today, we cannot count on our listeners to be either interested or informed. Here, we see the need for a new approach—or rather, the return to an older, more integrated approach to apologetics that engages the whole human person. Many contemporary apologists—myself included—look to both reason and imagination to help us lead people to know about, follow, and love our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Seven Dangers in the Last Few Years of Your Ministry | ThomRainer.com
“To be clear, I want to avoid seven dangers in my last years of ministry. And I know I can succumb to any and all of these dangers without His strength, His mercy, and His plan.”

The Banner of Truth Trust Turns 60 Years Old | TGC
“Iain Murray is 86 years old. Sixty years ago today, along with Jack Cullum and Sidney Norton, officially founded Banner of Truth, the Reformed-evangelical publisher that began out of Westminster Chapel in London in 1957.”

Go Ahead Leaders, Take That Vacation | Michael Hyatt
Michael Hyatt gives us 7 strategies to optimize time off and come back refreshed.

Control Your Sexuality | Tim Challies
“Stop masturbating. Is that too blunt? I don’t think it is. I think men need to hear it. Whether you’re single or married, just stop. Masturbation is self-love. It runs entirely counter to the heart of our Savior, who ‘came not to be served but to serve’ (Mark 10:45). It is counterfeit and fraudulent sexuality. Because it involves no woman, it is more properly a form of homosexuality than heterosexuality. It’s immature, it’s a misuse of God’s gift, it’s just plain dumb. You ought to be ashamed and embarrassed by it. So cut it out already and show some self-control.”

Are Video Games Keeping Young Men Out of the Work Force? | Alex Chediak, The Stream
“Screen time for young men without college degrees has more than doubled from the period 2004-2007 to the period 2011-2014. Unemployed young men now spend 2 to 3 times as many hours in front of a screen, compared to those who have jobs. More to the point, the percentage of screen time devoted to computer games has increased. Video games aren’t just sucking more time, they’re increasingly preferred over blogs, streamed videos and Facebook.”

New Books

The Porn Myth: Exposing the Reality Behind the Fantasy of Pornography by Matt Fradd

Westminster Confession of Faith: Journal Edition

Honoring the Elderly: A Christian’s Duty to Aging Parents by Rev. Brian L. De Jong

Kindle Deals

For your non-Kindle book buying needs please consider using Reformation Heritage Books in the USA and Reformed Book Services in Canada. Good value prices and shipping.

Walking with God in the Season of Motherhood: An Eleven-Week Devotional Bible Study by Melissa Kruger ($4.99)

Humble Roots: How Humility Grounds and Nourishes Your Soul by Hannah Anderson ($0.99)

Saving Leonardo: A Call to Resist the Secular Assault on Mind, Morals, and Meaning by Nancy Pearcey ($2.99)

The Pastor’s Wife: Strengthened by Grace for a Life of Love by Gloria Furman ($2.99)

Blogs

Well, as usual, I didn’t get as much done as I hoped to during my “blog vacation.” Shona says my epitaph should be: “That took longer than I expected.” I’m way too optimistic about my DIY abilities. Anyway, normal service is now being resumed.

A High View of Marriage Includes Divorce
“Evangelical and confessional churches are striving to maintain a high view of marriage in a culture that is ripping the institution to shreds. So extra-biblical barriers to divorce can be well-meant. They try to protect marriage by doing everything possible to avoid divorce. In doing so, they not only fail to keep a high view of marriage. They also spread lies about the gospel, divorce, the value of people, the character of God, and the nature of sexual sin.”

An Open Letter to Husbands who Abuse Their Wives

Dear Abuser…

I want to make it clear that if you want to invoke Bible verses to control and manipulate your wife, the Bible is against you.

If you harm your wife physically, sexually, emotionally, or materially, Jesus stands against you.

To hide behind the Bible in order to justify how you treat your wife is vile. Justifying your attitudes and actions with the Bible is like blaming the cook book for the food poisoning you caused when you cooked a meal with putrid meat. The issue isn’t with the book, but what you brought out of your fridge.

You are destroying your family, dishonouring God, and deceiving yourself.

The Average Sermon Length of These 10 Well Known Pastors
“We did a little research of our own to discover just how long the most watched preachers in America preach. You might be surprised by the results. We certainly were.”

Fasting 101
“Fasting is a lost art in pursuit of the spiritual disciplines and one that seems quite distant from everyday life in modern western culture. However, when we look to Scripture there is an expectation that believers would fast as a part of the Christian life (Matt. 6:16; 9:15). So, before you dismiss this practice as only for Tibetan monks…let’s explore a few of the “whys and hows” of fasting so that we might enrich our spiritual development and the lives of those whom we walk alongside.”

Hope When Your Children Stray
“Today when I’m counseling the parents of a rebellious child, here are five things I tell them: ”

If you’re watching “Game of Thrones,” you’re watching porn.
“If you think you can somehow filter out the porn and only take in the art, you are deceived and double-minded as well.  Porn does what porn does: as soon as it enters the scene, it removes all dignity and humanity.  All that is left is body parts and the consuming of other humans.  You can’t keep someone’s dignity once you have already devoured it.  You don’t get porn and human dignity; you get porn or human dignity.”

Why Did Jesus Need the Holy Spirit?
“John Owen set out eleven ways in which the Holy Spirit is said to have worked in the life and ministry of Jesus in the Scriptures:”

Losing your voice: 4 ways pastors lose pulpits
1. Burn out
2. Rust out
3. Kicked out
4. Fall out

Your Smartphone Costs A Lot More Than You Think It Does
“Maybe it is called a smartphone because it sucks the brains out of otherwise-creative and intelligent creatures. Sayonara, so-called smartphone! Onward I shall go, towards living a quiet, productive, God-honoring life.”

Kindle Books

The Imperfect Pastor: Discovering Joy in Our Limitations through a Daily Apprenticeship with Jesus by Zach Eswine $4.99.

The Pastor’s Justification: Applying the Work of Christ in Your Life and Ministry by Jared Wilson $2.99.

The Pastor and Counseling: The Basics of Shepherding Members in Need by Jeremy Pierre and Deepak Reju $3.99.

God and Stephen Hawking: Whose Design Is It Anyway? by John Lennox $3.53.

Blogs

Preaching Under Pressure
“The Lord does not teach us to pray in a classroom. He teaches us to pray on a battlefield”

Angered At and Angry With
“As I work my way through the proverbs, I see anger everywhere. I see the folly of anger, the danger of anger, the sinfulness of anger. I see that the godly learn to control their anger while the fools let it rage.”

Discovering Christ in the Psalms
“It should not, therefore, surprise us that the New Testament writers cite the Psalms more than any other book of the Old Testament. Neither should it surprise us that, in each citation, Jesus and the Apostles teach us that the Psalms are Messianic in nature. In so doing, they teach us the principles that we must follow as we seek to discover Christ in all the rest of the Psalms.”

Laboring to No Purpose
“It is doubtless very significant that, even by the time of his Ascension, Jesus did not leave a mega-church behind him on earth. Rather, it was through his weak and bumbling disciples that he began to build his church in the face of the hellish powers that sought to withstand it.”

Martin Luther’s Shelter Amid the Flood of Depression
“Singing does more than raise our hearts’ affection for the triune God; it steels us with confidence to stand defiant against our enemy. It’s not the prince of darkness grim for whom we tremble. No, we tremble in the presence of our Lord Jesus, whose gospel is the declaration of our enemy’s demise (Col. 2:13–15). His kingdom is forever (Heb. 1:8; John 16:33). ”

Learning the life of faith
“One of our pastor’s said recently, “We associate evil with pain, and good with pleasure. But God does not associate things this way.”"

5 Reasons Sermons Fail
To preach is to occasionally lay an egg. Every preacher has felt it, and every preacher hopes to never feel it again. What did I do wrong? Why did the sermon flop? How do I avoid this ever happening again? These questions, and many more, hound the conscience of the preacher who’s delivered a still-born sermon.

Reset Interview
Here’s an interview about Reset: Living a Grace-Paced Life in a Burnout Culture.

Kindle Books

What is the Gospel? by Greg Gilbert.

How to Read the Bible Book by Book: A Guided Tour by Gordon Fee $3.99.

Fierce Women: The Power of a Soft Warrior by Kim Wagner $2.09

Recently I was asked for resources on emotional intelligence (sometimes called EQ). Here’s what I had on file with some summaries and extracts from the articles.

The Must-Have Pastoral Skill | Head Heart Hand
Here’s my take on Daniel Goleman’s book, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, and how it applies to pastoral ministry. Leaders on all fronts can benefit from sharpening their interpersonal skills and, arguably, Emotional Intelligence is even more important for pastors and those in ministry than for those in business.

What’s the must-have pastoral skill?

“Public speaking?” No.

“Time-management?” No.

“Theological expertise?” No.

Give up?

It’s social intelligence. Some call it “interpersonal skills” or “EQ”(Emotional Intelligence).

How to Boost Your (and Others’) Emotional Intelligence | Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic and Michael Sanger, Harvard Business Review
EQ is considered by Goleman and others to be malleable and changeable. Click through for the details, but here are a few tips on how to boost your EQ:

• Turn self-deception into self-awareness
• Turn self-focus into other-focus
• Be more rewarding to deal with
• Control your temper-tantrums
• Display humility, even if it’s fake

7 Habit of Highly Emotionally Intelligent People | Harvey Deutschendorf, Fast Company

1. They focus on the positive
2. They surround themselves with positive people
3. They are able to set boundaries and be assertive when necessary
4. They are forward thinking and willing to let go of the past
5. They look for ways to make life more fun, happy, and interesting
6. They choose how to expend their energy wisely
7. They are continually learning and growing towards independence

Ignore Emotional Intelligence at Your Own Risk | Claudio Fernández-Aráoz, Harvard Business Review

Back in the late 1990s I did my first quantitative analysis on the subject, using information on 250 managers I had personally hired or recommended for promotion to our clients, mostly in Latin America in those days. I analyzed the correlation of three main candidate variables (experience, IQ, and emotional intelligence) with the person’s performance once on the job and was amazed with the results. When the appointees excelled in experience and IQ but had low emotional intelligence, their failure rate was as high as 25%. However, those people with high emotional intelligence combined with at least one of the other two factors (experience or IQ) only failed in 3%-4% of the cases. In other words, emotional intelligence coupled with high IQ or very relevant experience was a very strong predictor of success. However, highly intelligent or experienced candidates who lacked emotional intelligence were more likely to flame out.

My colleagues soon replicated this analysis for many different geographies and highly diverse cultures, including Japan and Germany, and the results were similar everywhere. People are hired for IQ and experience and fired for failing to manage themselves and others well. (emphasis added)

Research: Technology Is Only Making Social Skills More Important | Nicole Torres, Harvard Business Review

[The NBER Working Paper] explains three things about the growing importance of social skills: 1) social skills are valued in jobs across the entire wage distribution (as seen in the chart), 2) social skill and cognitive skill complement each other, and 3) jobs that require low levels of social skills are also likely to be routine jobs (filing clerks, factory jobs) at high risk of automation.

7 Interview Questions That Determine Emotional Intelligence | Carolyn Sun, Entrepreneur.com

1. Who inspires you and why?
2. If you were starting a company tomorrow, what would be its top three values?
3. If business priorities change, describe how you would help your team understand and carry out the shifted goals?
4. Did you build lasting friendships while working at another job?
5. What skill or expertise do you feel like you’re still missing?
6. Can you teach me something as if I’ve never heard of it before? (It can be anything: a skill, a lesson, a puzzle.)
7. What are the top three factors you would attribute to your success?

5 Reasons Emotional Intelligence Is so Important for Leaders | Art Rainer
In this article, Art also looks at Goleman’s work on Emotional Intelligence. Here are his 5 reasons:

1. You make better decisions
2. You treat others better
3. You regret less
4. You become more trustworthy
5. You are more likely to experience success

7 Reasons Why Emotional Intelligence is One Of The Fastest Growing Job Skills | Harvey Deutschendorf, Fast Company

1. They can handle pressure healthily
2. They understand and cooperate with others
3. They’re good listeners
4. They’re more open to feedback
5. They’re empathetic
6. They set an example for others to follow
7. They make more thoughtful and thorough decisions

Emotional Intelligence Has 12 Elements. Which Do You Need to Work On? | Daniel Goleman and Richard E. Boyatzis, Harvard Business Review
Goleman and Boyatzis take a closer look at specific competencies of Emotional Intelligence to help readers get a more well-rounded view of what Emotional Intelligence actually is. Follow their fictional account of a well-liked manager with uneven EI skills to further understand how the domains and competencies apply.

18 Behaviors of Emotionally Intelligent People | Travis Bradberry, Motto
Here are a few favorites from Bradberry’s list:

1. You have a robust emotional vocabulary
2. You’re curious about people
4. You know your strengths and weaknesses
6. You are difficult to offend
7. You know how to say no (to yourself and others)
12. You don’t seek perfection
14. You disconnect
16. You get enough sleep