Haters Gonna Hate: How To Deal With Three Kinds Of Hate Mail

Young Pastor, Obscurity Is Your Friend

The Reading Habits Of Today’s Pastors

Pastors and social media (1): Be Positive

Pastors and social media (2): Be Intentional

Pastors and Social media (3): Be Sociable

I’d Rather Be A Godly Administrator Than An Ungodly Minister

Education And The Digital Revolution

Church Power Games

Don’t Sandwich Negative Feedback

Why Do Rookie Pastors Get Fired?

The Most Essential Life Skill: Teachability

Relax! You’ll Be More Productive

10 Ways To Give Constructive Criticism

Administrator Appreciation Day

17 Tips For Better Church Meetings

Church Size: Is 150 The “Magic” Number?

Ministry Miseries Or Pastoral Pleasures

Developing Pastoral Antennae

Reformed Theology And Ragged Schools

Disarming Your Hearers

Work Less To Do More

What Would I Do If I Was Falsely Accused Of Sexual Immorality?

Words Of Comfort For Bereaved Parents

Cheerful leadership

Climbing Leadership

Confident Leadership

Clear Leadership

Communicative Leadership

Courageous And Compassionate

Service Bay 1: Routine

Service Bay 2: Relaxation

Service Bay 3: Recreation

Service Bay 4: Rest

Service Bay 5: Re-thinking

Service Bay 6: Reprioritize

Service Bay 7: Return

10 Types Of Christian Leadership

Paper v Pixels

A Swear Word For Creative Types

Making Ideas Happen: 99% Perspiration

Leading And Reading

Christian Hiring And Firing

For president, I want the guy who’s failed

The mailbox mystery

Is it time to visit the soul care garage?

The secret of corporate integrity

Violent and Original Work

Don’t live for a legacy

A massage or a message?

Pastoral supermodels

Learning from the wrecker’s yard

Six simple ways to avoid burnout

Compassion fatigue

The truth dresses down

My hate-love relationship with seminary

Let the dummies give the answer

I met a “celebrity” pastor yesterday

Do I have a parrot on my shoulder?

Are you like Apple or Google?

The dirty little secret of overnight success

Lessons from Thomas Verelli’s supreme court choke

The secret to grace under pressure

Can you enjoy ministry too much?

6 time management tips from entrepreneurs

5 types of work that will fill your day

The softer side of leadership

7 strategies to stop procrastinating

Learning to be a power listener

A desk that could save your life!

A divine invitation to pastoral rest

A digital dictionary for leaders

10 digital commandments

Why appreciation matters so much

A son’s moving tribute to his pastor father

Pastoral ministry course

Amiable leadership

Three types of bosses that should be fired

Is perfectionism always bad for you?

Chris Larson leadership lectures

Diligence + time = excellence

Four destructive myths most pastors still live by

What’s the best way to study? Top ten tips

Al Mohler on Mark Driscoll

Location, location, location

Prepare for church discipline

Practice church discipline

Want to learn faster? Try the ibrain

Womb seminary

The role of nursing mothers in training pastors

The fatherly mother (or motherly father?)

Wanted: men of exceptional character

Two cautions for Christian leaders

Stars, sloths, sinners, saints, and stalwarts

Don’t spiritualize your management problems: fix them!

Your own personalized Google

Meeting matters

A body-language gallery

Pastoral theology resources

How to lose friends and not influence anyone

Why I left my congregation

96 minutes of daily interruptions

The Talk-O-meter

Top 20 most influential books in my life

What does it take to come up with a really good idea?

7 essential mental activities

The bull-loving matador

In the pastoral bullring

4 ways to benefit from criticism

20 ways to beat “meeting-phobia”

Top ten meeting personalities

My “I’m-never-going-to-get-to-it” list

Chris Larson lecturing on leadership at PRTS

Michael Hyatt’s parting message

Fighting time poverty

The Devil on time management: Squander, stretch, squeeze

10 P’s of time management

Does your desk glorify God?

Leading by listening

Trash it!

Lord, teach me how to teach

Leadership lecture: The honest steward

Gold-plated investment opportunity

Ministers and money

Money matters

Time to declare email bankruptcy?

Leadership lecture: The courageous captain

A call to courage for fellow-cowards

Focus on connection not perfection

Breaking news: Students multi-task during lectures!

The good news about stress

Leadership lecture: The patient shepherd

Leadership lecture: The humble servant

The pastor and the media: Ten tips

3 reasons not to delegate

Are you a pusher or a puller?

Sheep: “This time it’s personal”

The shepherd leader

Servant leadership

My life’s work

Staying on the leadership tightrope

Leadership lessons from president Obama?

I want to be a leader in the church

850 definitions of leadership

Focus intensely and renew regularly

Motives for ministry?

1-step-plan to superproductivity

Clutches in the churches

Facebook and the call to ministry

Achieve your goals (by not telling everyone)

7 tips for church meetings

Learning leadership from ants

How to be a speed reader

Zuckerberg’s favorite word: Um

The biggest mistake a leader can make

Three tips for training our children to lead

Six ways to supercharge your productivity

Why Tony Blair’s leadership journey failed

When to visit

The greatest servant

Two ways to live (and pastor)

Avoid decisions, avoid life

Evangelism and the risk of failure

Congregations gone wild

Pastors, please take a break

Leadership tips from Tony Hayward (not)

I hate the telephone

Focus short and long

Turn the ministry you have into the ministry you want

The men who stare at screens

Would John the Baptist have read the HBR

12 Things we’d tell our bosses if we could

Essential tools in the pastor’s toolbox

Ten laws of productivity

Am I called to the ministry?

Weak strength and strong weaknesses

A “normal” pastoral visit

The pastor as “feeler in chief”

Leading by silence

Leaders who last

Sympathy or empathy?

Who should we hire? Ask the receptionist

Reality check for would-be pastors

A leader’s mic is always on

Top ten motivation boosters and procrastination killers

Be more decisive…wash your hands

Boring grace

7 ways to deal with “haters”

“To do” or tomorrow

A “normal” week of pastoral ministry

Successful ministry or happy marriage

Preach or pastor

The pastor’s worst enemy

Pastoral ministry like having a baby

How to stop people idolizing you

True leadership: Opposing our friends

Leadership crisis

Victory through rest and recreation

The ministry is God’s sandbox

Good recoveries from bad communications

Pastoring clever people (or herding cats)

Investing in your mentor

God’s top 100 pastors

Wise leaders don’t know too much

How to say “No”

Squandering our most important resource

Mirror leadership

Work less to do more

The power of moral clarity

Improving pastoral productivity

For overworking pastors (and students)

Introverts in the church

How to boost your memory. Sleep!

Why do pastors suffer?

Novel advice for writers

How to keep track of what you’ve learnt

The 40-30-30 rule: Why risk is worth it

What does your desk say about you?

How to turn ministry into idolatry

Glorifying God and email

What not to say to some one who just lost their job

Should I tell the pastor?

The invisible gorilla

Confident but not sure

How the mighty fall

Naming names

How to take smart reading notes

Deference and deviance

When pastor’s kids go bad

The sinkhole syndrome

Help for hurting churches in dealing with apostasy

The two essential traits of great leaders

Failure: The last taboo?

80 ways to redeem time

The pastor’s worst day

Water for baptisms

Coping with “church surprises”

Poor excuses for sinful silence

Splits and sorrys

What do people really think of me?

In the hot seat

Blessed defeat

The risk of catastrophic victory

Learning on the tightrope

Why you should fire yourself

Three ways to keep your ego in check

From good to great

Scottish worthies

Wisdom from the world’s richest man?

Top 200 Leadership Resources

Top 300 Online Counseling Resources

Top 60 Online Resources For Battling Porn

1. Stress
2. Burnout
3. Marital Problems
4. Sexual Problems (infidelity, porn, etc.)
5. Depression
6. Conflict (family or ministry).

The prime causes of these are:

1. Isolation
2. Unrealistic Expectations
3. Poor Boundaries.

Phil wisely calls for deeper layers of these causes to be probed before listing Mark McMinn’s stress-prevention measures:

2.3 The Pastor’s Call (to a new congregation)

3 The Pastor’s Training

4.1 The Pastor’s Heart

Links to previous lectures on the Pastors Preparation, Qualifications, and Call can be found here.

And how do we do that?

We do it, first, by preaching, by regularly setting forth clear standards of Christian confession, character, and conduct in our regular preaching ministry. Our flock needs to know where the fences are, where the no-go areas are, and what to expect if they cross them.

Second, we prevent church discipline by pastoral visitation. We need to keep in close and regular contact with the sheep to gauge where they are in their walk with God. In those one-to-one situations we may detect small changes in belief, attitude, spirit or character that can be addressed before they become big and irreversible problems.

However, no matter how well we preach and pastor, no matter how much we try to prevent it, church discipline problems are going to arise. It’s therefore best to prepare the congregation, and especially the officebearers, before it arises.

Early in a a pastor’s ministry (not the first sermon, of course, but certainly within a few months) he should preach a sermon on church discipline, before he has to deal with any cases. That keeps the subject objective and avoids personalizing it. Points to make may include:

The necessity of church discipline
One Church order book puts it like this: “Any institution or society which is to function effectively must be well-ordered: it must have recognised means of correcting aberrations which threaten its integrity. This is true pre-eminently of the Church of Jesus Christ, whose witness in the world depends so intimately on the godly behavior of its members.”

The warrant for church discipline
This is not something thought up by legalistic control-freaks. Rather, it has divine warrant (Matthew 18:15-19). So important did the Reformers see church discipline that they included it as one of the marks of the church along with preaching and the sacraments.

The benefits of good church discipline
Listen to this comprehensive list of benefits from a Scottish book of Church order: “Church discipline and censures are of great use and necessity in the Church, that the name of God, by reason of ungodly and wicked persons living in the Church, be not blasphemed, nor his wrath provoked against his people; that the godly be not leavened with but preserved from the contagion, and stricken with fear; and that sinners who are to be censured may be ashamed, to the destruction of the flesh and saving of the spirit in the day of the Lord Jesus.”

The procedure for church discipline
The roolz! Don’t we just love ‘em!! Well, whether we love them or not we’d better get to know them, and get to know them fast. I know it is far more edifying and enjoyable to read the latest books from Reformation Heritage Books, but knowing the intricacies of the church’s discipline procedures could save a pastor’s ministry, and even save a soul.

As so many of the problems associated with church discipline arise from a lack of procedure, a failure to follow it, or an abuse of it, we must familiarize ourselves with the principles and the practice. If your church does not have any formal procedures, then find one that does, get their protocols, and copy or adapt their methods. Train the elders in this and also communicate to the congregation what they can expect, so that they are not taken by surprise or think that they are being unfairly treated.

Whatever we do, we must not abuse, shortcut or override the stated procedures, however tempted we are to do so. When some people are accused of sins, they train their sights on the procedures rather than their sin, and can easily turn the focus away from themselves, away from what they have done, and to what we have done or not done in the process.

The consequences of failed church discipline
If church discipline is not practiced, or if it is inconsistently or poorly practised, it can destroy a ministry, a congregation, or even a denomination. Paul says that failure to discipline can result in congregational sickness and even death (1 Corinthians 11:29-32). Jesus warns the church in Thyatira that his frown is upon them because of their failure to discipline a false teacher in their midst (Rev. 2:20-23).

The positive aim of church discipline
The ultimate aim of church discipline is not punishment but restoration (Gal. 6:1). Robert Murray McCheyne describes how he came to see the value of church discipline despite his initial reluctance to practice it.

When I first entered upon the work of the ministry among you, I was exceedingly ignorant of the vast importance of church discipline. I thought that my great and almost only work was to pray and preach. I saw your souls to be so precious, and the time so short, that I devoted all my time, and care, and strength, to labor in word and doctrine. When cases of discipline were brought before me and the elders, I regarded them with something like abhorrence. It was a duty I shrank from; and I may truly say it nearly drove me from the work of the ministry among you altogether. But it pleased God, who teaches His servants in another way than man teaches, to bless some of the cases of discipline to the manifest and undeniable conversion of the souls of those under our care; and from that hour a new light broke in upon my mind, and I saw that if preaching be an ordinance of Christ, so is church discipline. I now feel very deeply persuaded that both are of God – that two keys are committed to us by Christ: the one the key of doctrine, by means of which we unlock the treasures of the Bible; the other the key of discipline, by which we open or shut the way to the sealing ordinances of the faith. Both are Christ’s gift, and neither is to be resigned without sin.

Next?
Having prepared for Church discipline, we must also practice it, and we’ll look at that tomorrow.

In the Scottish Highlands there are many single track roads; they allow only one car at a time. Every hundred yards or so you can find little passing places where two cars can squeeze by. Many’s a time I ended up on one of these single track roads behind a bunch of sheep, slowly moseying along. Initially I would hoot my horn, rev my engine, shout out the window – all to no avail. I learned to simply wait until they decided to saunter off the road and back into their fields again. Nothing would rush them. 

When you are about to blow a gasket or a fuse with someone in your congregation, remind yourself, “They are only sheep…and so am I.” What’s the point of hooting your horn and revving up your engine. Be patient.

2. The shepherd knows his sheep
I have to be honest, despite years of looking at sheep, they still all look the same to me. Yet, I could walk through a field with a shepherd and he would know the names and even the characters of each one. He would know their ewe, their ram, and their lambs. He knew the scrapes they had been in and the number of times he had to rescue them.

While the pastor should study and know the nature of sheep in general, he should study and know his own sheep in particular. The first priority in going to a new congregation should be to get to know everyone’s names – from oldest to youngest – as quickly as possible. Then work at knowing their characters, personalities, gifts, struggles, etc.

3. The shepherd values his sheep
I’ve often been amazed at the misty and dreamy expressions that come across shepherds’ faces as they talk about their sheep or point them out. They seem to say, “They may be only sheep, but they are my sheep.” They care for them and think about them constantly. One shepherd who moved to the city for a while told me that he once woke up in the night with a dream about one of his sheep. He phoned his mother to check up on it, and sure enough, the sheep was in need of medical attention. Explain that!

The pastor should value each and every sheep as highly as possible – whatever their physical, spiritual or financial health! Statistics mean little to the pastor. 99 may be doing well, but if one is missing, he will move heaven and earth to find it. When I first moved to the Scottish Highlands, in the course of pastoral visitation, I used to innocently ask, “So how many sheep do you have?” I could never figure out why the answers were so vague until my Scottish Highland wife told me, “David! That’s like asking how much money do you have in the bank!” I stopped asking. So why do we always ask pastors, “How many are in your congregation?” Like the shepherd, the pastor values each sheep as of infinite worth. So whether he has 10 or 1000, the value is the same – infinite!

4. The shepherd loves his sheep
The shepherd does not just value his sheep as if they were units of economic production (in fact most Scottish shepherds I know made a financial loss on most of their sheep). He loves them; and not just as a collective, but as individuals. He does not just have loving feelings but takes loving actions.

The pastor will find it easy to love some of his sheep. But there are others… Pray over the particularly unloveable ones. Ask God to help you find something to love in them, or to help you love them even if there is nothing loveable about them  – after all that’s what the Great and Good Shepherd does daily for you! 

5. The shepherd observes his sheep
No matter what day I looked out at the sheep they all looked the same and all did the same. However a shepherd can detect the smallest difference. He can sense problems long before they fully develop. He sees a sheep in an unusual spot in the field. He sees a change in its posture or eating habits. And he takes action.

The good pastor will develop these powers of acute and careful observation as well. He will develop an instinct for problems in his sheep’s lives. He senses a different expression on the face, a different posture in worship, a change in vocal tone, and he may not be able to put his finger upon it, but he sense something is wrong. And often a few wise questions reveal well-founded fears.

6. The shepherd feeds his sheep
Hungry sheep are unhappy sheep…and noisy sheep. The shepherd knows the best fields to take his sheep at different times of the year. He knows when they need particular kinds of grass. He knows when water is needed to refresh and reinvigorate his flock.

The Apostle Peter had a passion for feeding the flock of God, and we know where he got that from (John 21:15-22; 1 Pet. 5:2). When I started out in the ministry, one senior minister told me, “If you keep their bellies full, you won’t hear any bleating.” It takes a wise Shepherd to know what kind and amounts of food each sheep needs. May God help us to feed the right kinds of food, in the right amounts, at the right times. And may he help us not to starve or over-feed our sheep, nor give them indigestion!

7. The shepherd leads his sheep
In Western cultures, the shepherd follows behind the sheep, and directs the sheep with dogs. But in the East it was the custom for shepherds to go before the sheep, to break up the way, to clear paths of danger, to take the safest path. He leads them beside the still waters, in straight paths, through the darkest valley.

Too many Western pastors have embraced the Western model of Shepherding when it comes to leadership. They follow the sheep rather than lead them. The pastor should be out in front of his sheep in his theological knowledge, in his spiritual experience, in his awareness of danger, in his plotting of the course, etc.

8. The shepherd speaks well of his sheep
In Scotland I eventually learned not to criticize or mock sheep in front of their shepherd; it was a rather sensitive topic! And I also learned to listen to wonderful long descriptions about individual sheep, as the shepherd brought out the strengths of each member of his flock.

The pastor should make it a policy to speak well of his congregation as a whole and of its individual members. If someone criticizes one of his sheep, he leaps to his/her defense and brings out the good. When he travels to other places and is asked about his sheep, he replies with words of affection and appreciation. And not just because words of criticism will almost always get back to the sheep.

9. The shepherd pursues his sheep
When a sheep is missing or straying, the shepherd does not say, “O well, I’ve got 99 left.” No, he seeks until he finds it (Lk. 15:3ff). No matter how far away, no matter how foolish the sheep has been, no matter how frequent his straying, the shepherd goes after it.

When a person is missing from public worship, the pastor inquires after him or her. When a person is missing a few weeks in a row, the pastor is getting ready to leave the 99 and go after the straying soul. When the pastor hears that a member has been involved in a heated public argument, or has started dating a non-Christian, or has been saying inappropriate things on Facebook, etc, his cloak is on, his staff is on his hand, and he’s on his way to recover the stray. My brother-in-law once so spent himself hunting for three lost sheep (the woolly kind) that he just about died with exhaustion! He would not give up, and neither should the pastor. 

10. The shepherd rests his sheep
In Scotland, just before the winter started, the shepherds would go out into the moors and mountains to gather their flocks that had been enjoying the summer pastures. Sometimes it would take a few days to drive them to their winter shelter. But he never chased them or pushed them beyond their limits. He knew when they needed a rest and a breather.

There are times in congregational life when the pastor must pressure the sheep to move on. Maybe, there is a building program to be undertaken, or an outreach campaign that needs all hands on deck. However, the wise shepherd knows when he has driven the sheep far enough and long enough. He knows there are seasons of rest and refreshment needed as well.

11. The shepherd perseveres with his sheep
There are days when the shepherd feels exhausted, discouraged, frustrated and unappreciated. He is tempted to give up. “Why do I get up every day and give myself to such ungrateful creatures?” However, the good shepherd patiently perseveres.

This is not to say that the spiritual shepherd never leaves a flock and moves on to take care of another. It is simply to say that he does not do so when the first problems appear. And when he does sense the Great Shepherd’s call to move on, he may leave the sheep, but the sheep never leave his heart.

O that the Lord would make us and give us such shepherds today, according to His promise: “Then I will give you shepherds after my own heart, who will lead you with knowledge and understanding” (Jer. 3:15).

I pastored for 12 years in the Scottish Highlands. During that time, I was surrounded by sheep: sheep on the roads, sheep on the mountains, sheep on the beeches, sheep in my yard. O, yes, and sometimes sheep in the shepherds’ fields. My study on the Isle of Lewis was 12 inches away from a field full of sheep. Sometimes at night I would look up from my computer and see many pairs of luminous green eyes staring at me through my window! I got to know sheep pretty well. What did I learn?

1. Sheep are foolish
I don’t know what sheep would score in an animal IQ, but I think they would be close to the bottom of the scale. They seem to only know how to do one thing well – eat grass (and produce more grass-eating sheep).

It’s possible to know little, yet not be foolish; but not if you are a sheep. They are so irrational. You watch them as they pause in front of a stream. They know they can’t jump it or swim it. So what do they do? They jump in anyway!

2. Sheep are slow to learn
Every shepherd will tell you countless stories about how sheep can be taught a very painful lesson, and yet fail to learn the painful lesson. A sheep may get caught in barbed wire trying to break through a fence. And the next day it will try it again, and again,… 

3. Sheep are unattractive
Some animals may not be very bright, but make up for it with grace and elegance in their movement and actions. But sheep are so awkward, so lacking in agility and dignity. Although some shepherds may tell you differently, to most outside observers sheep are dirty, smelly, and ugly.

4. Sheep are demanding
Ever watch a lamb suckle its mother? Almost as soon as it is born, it is violently sucking its mother’s udders. And that insatiable demand never leaves them. They demand grass, grass, and more grass; day after day, and night after night. (Do they ever sleep?) And when snow is on the ground, they aggressively demand food from the shepherd. Just listen to them bleat if their troughs are empty even for a short time. And watch the life-or-death stampede when the shepherd appears. 

5. Sheep are stubborn
Have you ever tried to move a sheep? It’s like trying to move an elephant. Ever watched a shepherd try to manoeuvre a sheep into a fold or a dip-tank. It’s like trying to wrestle with a devil. Half a dozen sheep invaded my garden once. I thought it would be easy to hustle them out the wide gate again. But it was as if an electric shield (visible only to sheep) stretched across the gap. I could get them to go anywhere and everywhere, but through that gate. 

6. Sheep are strong
I’ve watched the most macho of men beaten by sheep. You look at their skinny “arms” and “legs” and think “easy.” Next thing you are flat on your back or face down in the dirt. I’ve been flattened by running sheep. It was like getting run over by a tank. 

7. Sheep are straying
Perhaps the main reason Scripture chooses sheep to characterize us, more than any other animal, is because of its well-deserved reputation for straying (Isa. 53:6) and getting lost (Lk. 15:3ff). So many times I was out in the middle of nowhere when I would come across a sheep – miles from anyone and anything – and totally unconcerned. I would look up on a cliff and there was a sheep out on a lethal ledge. Other times, when fishing miles from anywhere, I would come across ditches and bogs with the decaying remains of a wandering sheep, and I’d think, “How did that get out here?”

8. Sheep are unpredictable
If you travel along the roads of the Scottish Highlands you will soon learn to expect the unexpected. You look ahead on a quiet piece of long straight road with no cars. You spy sheep in the distance on the side of the road. They watch you driving along towards them. Hundreds of yards pass. You are almost level. Well, they aren’t going to cross the road now, are they? Screeeeeech! Well, what do you know! 

9. Sheep are copycats
OK, bit of a mix of metaphors here, but I think you get my point. When one sheep decides to start running, they all decide to start running. If you were able to ask one, “Why did you start running?” it would say, “Well, because he started running.” The next would say the same. And the next one. And when you got to the last sheep he would just say, “I dunno.”

10. Sheep are restless
It always puzzled me how little sheep slept. I would be in my study at midnight, look out, and there they were still eating grass. And no matter what time I arose in the morning – 3am or 5am – they would still be eating grass.

Other times, there would be a beautiful summer evening when everything was still and quiet and you would come across a field full of sprinting sheep (usually due to the Scottish midges – look it up on Google).

I once heard that for sheep to lie down they need freedom from fear, freedom from friction with others, freedom from hunger, and freedom from pests and parasites. From what I’ve seen, that combination is very rare.

11. Sheep are dependent
Some animals can cope and thrive without any close supervision. Not sheep. They are very dependent on their shepherd. They cannot live without him (or her).

12. Sheep are the same everywhere
I’ve been in a number of different countries in my life and enjoyed the many cultural differences. But sheep are the one constant – in character if not in looks. The American sheep is the same as the African sheep (see 1-11 above), which is the same as the Asian sheep, which is the same as…

The shepherd is a sheep
Well, of course, this is not a zoology lecture, nor an agricultural seminar. The sheep metaphor reveals the nature of the sinner, even the saved sinner, and hence the difficulty of the task facing the shepherd.

And the greatest difficulty of all stems from the fact that the shepherd is also a sheep! It might be easy for pastors to read this post and say, “Hey that sounds like my congregation!” But it also sounds uncomfortably too much like you (and me) as well doesn’t it!

So how does a sheep-like-shepherd shepherd sheep?

That’s one for tomorrow.

In Obama, Palin met fame before they could grow, Noemie Emery traces the present frustrations and failures of President Obama and Sarah Palin to their over-rapid rise to public prominence.

Two years ago, two superstars lit up a dazzled political universe — young, stunning, lissome, and bursting with talent — and were propelled ahead of their time into prominence, after a minimal time on the national scene.

Two years later, it seems as if this has done them no favors: President Obama is widely seen as “overwhelmed” by his office, and Sarah Palin is meeting resistance establishing her credentials as a possible candidate against rivals with rather more seasoning.

Noemie argues that both would have been more useful and successful if, like Presidents John F Kennedy and Ronald Reagan, they had marinated longer in semi-obscurity before being thrust into the spotlight.

No one was scanning their words for inadvertent misstatements, or wholly involved in their glory or failure. Like wine, they matured in the dark, over time. Obama and Palin needed the six years or so of semi-obscurity they were about to embark on before ambition — and John McCain — intervened. Instead, their growth was checked at a critical moment, and, as it seems now, won’t be resumed quickly — not in the presidency as Obama is learning, or in a media frenzy, as Palin has found.

It turns out that eight or so years in this sort of semi-obscurity — working away in the state house or Senate, one of a number of solons and governors, growing into and grounding one’s natural talents — is what a good president needs.

They are famous for life; they will always have money; what they can never have back are the years washed out by destructive celebrity. “She’s been microwaved, she needs now to marinate,” somebody once said of Palin. But the time for slow-cooking is gone.

So, next time you long impatiently for a larger ministry, or look jealously at more prominent preachers, thank God that He’s marinating you in the slow-cooker, rather than letting you be frazzled in the microwave.

If you were watching a 30-second basketball video and a gorilla appeared on screen for nine seconds, you’d see it, right? Especially if it thumped its chest right in front of the camera! You couldn’t miss it, could you?

Well, Harvard University researchers conducted this experiment and found that 50% of viewers were so focused on the basketball that they missed the gorilla! (Try the video on a few people).

Conclusions: (1) We miss a lot of what goes on around us, and (2) we have no idea that we are missing so much.

In pastoral ministry it’s easy to miss the gorilla. We get so focused on our weekly sermons and our weekly pastoral visitation schedule that large chest-thumping gorillas become invisible to us – until they devour us!

There have certainly been times in my ministry when I’ve had such tunnel vision that I disregarded clear warning signs about impending problems in people’s relationships and situations. And it’s frighteningly easy to see when I re-run the “video.”

So how do we avoid missing the gorillas?

1. However busy and focused on weekly tasks, keep an eye and ear open for anomalies, inconsistencies, and the unusual among your flock.

2. Enlist the help of your elders. If 50% of people miss the gorilla, we greatly enhance our chances of seeing if we double the number of watching eyes. Ask your elders to share their concerns, their instincts, their “feelings” about possible warning signs.

3. Especially trust your wife’s intuition. Research has shown that women were not only more likely to see the unexpected but to investigate it. “Men are much more likely to assume they knew the reason for the unexpected result, and proceed without more analysis.” If your wife has a “hunch” about someone or some relationship it’s worth making some discrete inquiries.

4. Learn from our missed gorillas. Let’s pray that the Lord would open our eyes, make us more sensitive, and increase our pastoral awareness. Let’s not become like some in the experiment who could not be convinced that they were so blind! Even when they were shown the video again, they accused the researchers of switching the tape when they were not looking! There aren’t pastors like that, are there?

Ministerial Burnout
Two burnt-out pastors have approached me just in the past week. Michael Horton provokes some thought on this subject here and here.

Pastoral Succession
Colin Hansen recommends very conscious and deliberate steps to ensure successful transition from one pastor to another. I know where Colin is coming from and sympathize with the motives and aims, of course…but I’m not convinced.

Facebook Ministry
Tim Challies on how to (and how not to) use Facebook for ministry.

Timing Pastoral Visits
Brian Croft on when to vist and how long to stay.

The only thing I would emphasize is that although most illnesses are not as life-threatening today as they once were, I recommend that you always speak to a member of the family directly to find out how sick someone is.

If you just rely on an elder’s or deacon’s report, the urgency of the situation may not be communicated, and then you get a call a day or two later telling you that the person has died. Not a happy phone call to take. And not a happy visit to make next.

As Croft sums it up: ” In summary, always error on the shorter time…both in how long you stay and how long you wait to go.”